MEAT! ITS MORE MEAT! This meat isn't very sleepy. It's more nightmare-y and stressful. Join us, your hosts Jason, Doug, and Matt along with the never predictable Madame Webb, as we dissect this hearty analog horror. Today, we're peeling back the layers of Vita Carnis and serving it up with a girthy side of trimmings.
Part 2 next week!
Vita Carnis
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DLUTI.com
Unplanned Podnancy
Undefined Graphics (Photography & Graphic Design)
Ghoulish Mortals
Inquiries: dlutipod@gmail.com
Don't Look Under The Internet
PO BOX 6437
Aurora IL 60598
MEAT! ITS MORE MEAT! This meat isn't very sleepy. It's more nightmare-y and stressful. Join us, your hosts Jason, Doug, and Matt along with the never predictable Madame Webb, as we dissect this hearty analog horror. Today, we're peeling back the layers of Vita Carnis and serving it up with a girthy side of trimmings.
Part 2 next week!
Vita Carnis
Starting your own podcast? Use this link to receive a $20 Amazon gift card when you sign up for a paid account with Buzzsprout!
https://www.buzzsprout.com/?referrer_id=1671664
Linktree
Buy us a beer!
Join us in Discord!
DLUTI.com
Unplanned Podnancy
Undefined Graphics (Photography & Graphic Design)
Ghoulish Mortals
Inquiries: dlutipod@gmail.com
Don't Look Under The Internet
PO BOX 6437
Aurora IL 60598
Don't look under the internet.
Doug:I'm recording video. I'm recording noisio.
Speaker 4:Noisio, noisio, noisio, noisio, noisio.
Doug:Noisio.
Speaker 4:Great Sync Anyway, adam Webb oh.
Speaker 5:God, you're just open, you're cold opening with that.
Doug:Badly film.
Speaker 4:Madame Weeby, what do you think? Do you think like if someone, if she was making a web and someone like bumped into it and like destroyed it, she would go? Oh, madame Webb, god damn it.
Speaker 5:Nobody, nobody encourages this man.
Speaker 4:This is a horror internet comedy podcast starring yours truly, jason. Hello, darulo Darulo, darulo Darulo that's Doug funny over there. I think that guy is Matt Doug and I Madame Webb, and he knew my mother when she was in the Amazon researching spiders before she died.
Speaker 5:What is happening?
Speaker 4:I'm dating this web this episode pretty hard. I don't understand it. People are going to look back and Does Laura know about that? Yeah, we're going. No, she don't tell her. Okay, you won't tell her.
Doug:Shut your horn mouth If she don't?
Speaker 4:it's good for you. We have a fun one, and we're going to start this fun one off with a good old fashioned deludi house keeping Clap above your head.
Doug:Clap above your head. Thank you, Doug.
Speaker 4:So I have a couple of people I want to give a shooty, shooty, shooty out out too. First and foremost, over at our website we have Alpha Prospect.
Doug:Hello.
Speaker 4:What's that, what's that, what's that, what's that, what's that. And then we have Bean, cleaver Bean.
Speaker 1:Cleaver, the Sunday joint grave digger and Bean.
Speaker 4:Cleaver as they take on Bigfoot.
Doug:Bean, cleaver that's fantastic Bean Cleaver Best clean beaver yeah.
Doug:Best cult member name of the year. I don't care.
Speaker 4:With the hot jug of hot cheese, big jug of hot cheese. Yeah, we need that's what we should do.
Doug:Our next March Madness should be a bracket of patron patron brawl 20 of you enter.
Speaker 5:Most of you will die.
Speaker 4:But you'll all keep giving us.
Speaker 5:But you'll all keep paying us Be real.
Doug:it's going to be between Bean Cleaver and Big Jug of Hot. Cheese Jug of hot cheese.
Speaker 4:Yeah, we also have spicy unicorn. Ooh Ooh. Is it spicy, like heat spice or like sending nude spicy, maybe. Because, I don't need a unicorn sending me, it's Unidog. I don't want that Unidog and then also have as opposed to you don't have to say that it's like most things only have one penis.
Speaker 5:only the echidna doesn't.
Speaker 4:No, it's got one penis, just four hands, that's fair one shaft four tips. Yeah yeah, Doug's like why we also have witch of the wood, but the W's are V's. That's that entire thing is the user name, so it's witch of the wood, but the W's are V's, I'm just kidding. It's witch of the wood, so it's the witch of the wood, the V's, just like the movie the V's, which I got too bored during and I couldn't understand what they're saying, because the guy's like I'm going to speak, an old colonial pilgrim talk.
Doug:I'm like I don't understand what you're saying.
Speaker 4:There's black. Phillip just pierced you with his horns, though, so you're dead old man Spoiler alert Anyway that's been Deludi housekeeping. If you want to go and give us, I feel like there's more you want to be there more. Is there more?
Doug:Well, we had like. I want to say the very first Patreon that we ever had return, I think.
Doug:Holy shit, oh did we.
Doug:Yeah, I don't look at him. Oh yeah, Nicole she's back.
Speaker 5:The very first, nicole, I think we ever had, holy crap.
Speaker 4:The Nicole is. She's the one that started it all, because she's low key, Nicole, if you're listening to this, she's like the one that got us on just general people's radar because she started retweeting just a bunch of our stuff on Twitter and then she's got a moderate following on there that just kind of like boosted us a bit.
Doug:What a fucking boss. Bitch yeah OG sex pervert.
Speaker 1:Oh jeez no it's not sex pervert.
Doug:Did you check fourth wall? Do we read fourth walls as well?
Doug:Yeah, yeah, you just Cool Then we're good.
Doug:Okay, we're done.
Speaker 4:I didn't read, however, the thank yous that I had on there, so I sent out a thank you from Bean Cleaver that said I'm so fucking stoked to slap this Peans and Bean sticker on my annihilator.
Doug:Just clean it right on there, she's a thicc scion XB.
Speaker 4:Yeah, we also have from King. What's up?
Speaker 1:What's up?
Speaker 4:What's up? Fuck that dude. They say here's the $10. I owe you. I should have proof. Read it.
Speaker 5:Yeah, you did, you did fucking check that at all. God, I love that. I love that.
Doug:I was about to say Kings and Aven on our discord, if you want to get really offended and then leave. You can come join, Thanks.
Speaker 5:I got you. I should have proof read that. That was amazing, jesus Christ.
Doug:But just the reaction when he left his mouth was great.
Speaker 5:He tried to pull it back. He's like no.
Speaker 1:Put the word back in.
Speaker 5:Oh man, that was fucking funny, holy shit.
Speaker 4:It's the first time I've done that.
Doug:I don't know how completely and just put a big beep in there. So it's just like here's the $10.
Speaker 5:I owe you for 100%.
Speaker 1:Oh, 100% God. What should?
Doug:get for being in the live shows.
Speaker 5:Holy Lord, oh God, okay, jesus Christ, all right.
Speaker 4:Someone else. Take fourth wall and take it away from you.
Speaker 5:I don't have that in front of me.
Speaker 4:Oh God, that's funny. Anyway, give us money, patreoncom or diluitycom Do that thing. Thus concludes the housekeeping Boys. I got myself a little bit of Mexican food the other day.
Speaker 5:You know what I got Did you get carnitas, because I got some fucking carnitas the other day.
Speaker 4:I got carnice asada oh.
Speaker 5:I thought it was carnitas.
Speaker 4:It was made of flesh. I got carnice asada. Yeah, it's a new menu item called carnice asada.
Speaker 1:Did you need some flavor?
Doug:enhancer for it.
Speaker 1:Most people call it long.
Doug:It tastes bad. Long pig. Long, long pig.
Speaker 4:No, we're talking about something very, very fun. I had a full disclosure. I was unfortunately not able to finish it because Wow.
Speaker 5:Oh, you bitch, you fucking bitch. I've had a busy week. You goddamn bitch.
Speaker 4:No, fuck you, but what I've seen is probably some of the most entertaining stuff that, personally, I think has come through this show. I think I've enjoyed the bits that I've seen the most out of a lot. It reminds me a lot of what is it, though? Vitus carnus? It's Vita carnus, vita carnus. But it reminds me a lot of A Mr Flesh, pit B Gemini. And those have been my two favorites that we've covered and I am very excited to get into this.
Doug:Yeah, this is like the Blaine Horses.
Speaker 4:It's an analog whore, but it gets. It starts off things that piss me off.
Speaker 5:It does start off with things that are terrible, but it gets so much fucking better and, if I'm being 100% honest, if there was anything in this world that was as close to like Dead Space, the analog whore, like the origin of Dead Space analog whore, that's this. It's this fucking little series right here.
Speaker 4:Also, you all have probably wondered by Jason's audio. He's not with us in the room he's got he's dead. He's got the dead.
Speaker 5:You also may have noticed that.
Speaker 4:It's terminal.
Speaker 5:You can't group with your eyes if you're on YouTube.
Doug:No, yeah, but you can tell that he looks a little homeless. A little homeless, a little disheveled, a little.
Doug:Dude. I've been trying to get my hair cut Rough couple of weeks.
Speaker 5:I've need to get my hair cut for like a month and a half and I just kept putting it off and then I just got two weeks of horrendous sickness and now I look like I've lived underneath the fucking Golden Gate Bridge for four months.
Doug:I do have. I was going to say you do have Denim Jack is just right behind you like this is your camp and you're just like airing out your clothes.
Speaker 5:I'm not allowed to use the washing and drying machine, so I just have to string all my clothes up everywhere because people are afraid that my infection will just kill people.
Speaker 4:You haven't been able to go out and get a haircut and stuff because you're too busy spending all your days panhandling by the highway. Yeah.
Doug:And conducting wary travelers.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Doug:To full time job.
Speaker 4:Anyway, well, yeah, so vita carnis, it's a very entertaining one.
Doug:It's not Spanish either. Yes, it's not, it's just fun to say like that.
Speaker 5:It's. Those words are Latin for anybody who? Is yeah. But it's more fun to say Vita carnis, vita carnis, what?
Doug:does that mean it's not a Taco Bell fucking menu item.
Speaker 4:What does Vita carnis mean? Meat life.
Speaker 5:Yeah, meat life, meat, meat life, meat life, meat life.
Speaker 4:Did you seriously just do? Meat life, meat life. Oh my God, are you? They should be Meat life. Holy fuck. Where else to start Vita carnis? But in the beginning, am I right? Guys, you can find it all on YouTube. Just go to YouTube, just type in Vita carnis.
Doug:They're going to get your stuff. They have a very convenient viewing order playlist. Yeah, they do.
Speaker 1:Oh, my God he even puts the.
Speaker 5:He even puts the entire of like the first 75% of the content in one video.
Speaker 4:in case you have time for that, it's great, it's great, yeah, fucking fantastic, fucking documentary, yeah yeah.
Doug:And it's actually worth your while to watch that one instead of all this thing, you'll learn ones on their own, 100%.
Speaker 4:Yeah, this guy fucks.
Doug:Anyway, this guy fucks.
Speaker 4:I'm going to dive into it a little bit. I'm going to dive into it a little bit. So Episode one we start off with a video, a living meat research documentary. One intro and the crawl. Nothing weird.
Speaker 5:And there's a stain that.
Speaker 4:I love this bit. It reminds me that I'm like a pirate from the 90s. Because it's like A pirate from the 90s, viewer discretion, yeah.
Speaker 1:Because your discretion is advised.
Speaker 5:Yeah, because this has like four. Oh, like a content, like a video pirate because?
Doug:then yeah, because then immediately says like some Molly pirates and like white dad sneakers and like, yes, like the case with some tube socks yes, with some fucking Jorah yes, 100%.
Speaker 4:Oh my God, my Pongs and my Ginko's, no, but I thought I was a pirate in the 90s, because he get this like Almost in the first couple. You get this screen that says classified material. Federal law provides severe civil and criminal penalties for those unauthorized viewing of this footage and it's like you can get a penalty of five hundred thousand dollars. And I'm like I remember that shit from old VHS tapes that I didn't get illegally.
Doug:They still do that in DVDs as well. Yeah, but those I don't. Hey, hey you wouldn't download a car.
Speaker 5:Yeah, what if?
Doug:I could. Right, I have a 3D printer. Fuck you.
Speaker 4:Yes, start off. And this starts off in the typical way that Moot and I don't really care for anymore.
Speaker 1:It's a slide show.
Speaker 4:It's a slide show, and this is the part that just pisses me off a bit more. Be analog horror without it, though, so there's two things that that throw me off.
Doug:I'm just going to mention them right now. I'll excuse the slide.
Speaker 4:Yeah.
Doug:I'm excusing it because it's not a news channel.
Doug:It's not a news channel. Yeah, that's true, like a free hand bulletin and like bullshit yeah.
Speaker 4:I'm going to excuse it, but when I first watched this I was like really, because not only is it a slide show, but he uses AI fucking text of voice. That just throws me off.
Doug:And then also I'll tell you why I like this. Go ahead.
Doug:Later. I'll talk later. Yeah, we need to talk about this stuff later.
Doug:Yep, yeah, all right, fine, whatever Exactly why I said that. Anyway, we start off.
Speaker 4:And it's like earth. Things live here, big and small, fat and wide and skinny. There's fat from elephants to the mice. What's that dude's name?
Speaker 5:And you things, things have been here for a word or a word of her.
Doug:David Attenborough. Oh, I can do a word. Ai voice Morgan Freeman.
Speaker 5:That would be amazing. The meat is alive. Morgan Cleveland.
Speaker 4:The meat. Do it no. Warner Herzogman, perv Morgan being Cleveland. And then there was like Morgan being Cleveland and, but it mentions I don't like that one bit.
Speaker 5:If there's ever a Deludi D&D one shot session, that's going to be a fucking character.
Speaker 4:Morgan being it's an MPC, morgan being Cleveland, for sure it's the shop Mike's like we're not even like a minute.
Speaker 5:No, no, not even.
Speaker 4:I'm trying. I'm sorry.
Speaker 5:I have not had human contact in like five and a half days, so I will. I'm sorry, but I will. I will try.
Speaker 4:It's fine. So it starts off and it's like the earth Things live here. And it's like for millions of years Things. Shut up.
Speaker 5:Mike, you just got to be loud and you got to just go. Just keep talking.
Doug:I can't Trust that the editor will do things that Just sum it up, man so basically it's like, hey, these weird things just started fucking popping up.
Speaker 4:There's like these mysterious creatures that started popping up around the world and now we share a world with them. What are they? And it's like, well, there's a couple weird ones going on. They're like. They're like One of the most important ones that you're going to find is called the crawl, and I'm like what is that? And you get a little bit more information on not only the crawl, but like a little bit of backstory to these creatures. It mentions how these this research lab called Living it's literally called the National Living Meat Research and it's a lab that basically they devote their time to figure out what this new species is, where it came from and how it got here. All that good stuff. It basically says that these are the things that we know about it. It's like most of the shit's made of muscle, organs and bones and usually they resemble mammals without skin or it resembles raw meat. So think of it like a fucking turkey, raw turkey, raw turkey. Yeah, typically, these things consume organic material. Yeah.
Doug:They're red.
Doug:They can be red. And it says that they usually consume organic matter.
Speaker 4:Mainly it's flesh of other animals and typically it's dead flesh. These things usually consume their scavengers. They usually consume dead flesh. It's rare rare that they go for living things, but it happens, happens quite a bit. And we've got an introduction to that. We get an introduction to this first. Like I guess I'm going to call it like a subspecies of.
Doug:It's very rare, but it happens quite a bit. Jason, what did you not understand?
Doug:I was you know, I thought, about it.
Speaker 5:I'm not getting any answers from where my line of questioning was going, so I'm just reporting.
Doug:So loading, loading yeah.
Speaker 4:This, like meat, fleshy, meat based organism has been called the vitacarnas family, and in this family there are multiple subspecies. One of them is called the crawl. Exactly, and the crawl is part of this new family and we learned some information about the crawl. It's basically this like root system. I guess you could say Kind of like imagine like tree roots, or like when you pull a plant up out of the ground and see all the trees and stuff Like vines, like ivy, like ivy vines, things like that, yeah, and how this thing works is it's got it's vines, or tendrils, whatever you want to call them are very similar to it's peni.
Speaker 4:It's peni, it's peni is very similar to like arteries. It's got like blood flow in it.
Speaker 5:It's got multiple different, like the fucking war of the world's remake with Tom Cruise. Do you guys remember any? I?
Speaker 4:haven't seen that, so I'm going to just nod and agree.
Doug:It's kind of just like we're in the presence of mental illness. Yeah, it's like slim gyms are growing out of the earth and attaching themselves to things. It's the reality that I'm interested in.
Doug:You know when you come. Fuck, mr Reflushing.
Speaker 4:But it definitely is like a root system and it can grow almost anywhere Like this. This part of Vita's carna's family is very durable and it's thrives in every region.
Doug:Exactly.
Speaker 4:It's kind of like it's got ways to, I guess, adapt to any region it has, uses these tendrils to absorb nutrients in the soil around it or if it's in a nutrient like lacking area, like a more desert area, the bits of the roots that stick out of the ground are more black in color because it absorbs solar rays and it gets energy from that as well.
Speaker 5:I love the map that shows like where this stuff is abundant and it literally just shows every continent on earth and it's just like red.
Speaker 4:Because it can go everywhere and you're probably wondering, this invasive species that can grow everywhere is probably going to fuck up a bunch of ecosystems, right? No, actually, you'd be wrong on that one. Opposite it thrives. Oh yeah, it does the exact opposite. Whatever this thing is like, the roots in the branches that are out of the soil basically decay away and produce this like nutrient rich soil that the plants around the area use to grow and those growing plants bring in like herbivores and rabbits and shit, and that brings more predators and the root systems feed off of like carcasses as well. So any carcasses of like dead animals and stuff that are also around this thing will consume, along with the shit that these things leave behind. There's the circle of meat, it's the circle of meat you got it and it's very meat circle.
Speaker 4:I'm very like happy with how this like subtle little bit of, I like that, like subtle bit of lore that we get.
Speaker 1:You get a little bit of lore.
Speaker 4:And it's even like. They're even like oh yeah, that shit's like super good for humans too, because, like you know, you could potentially eat this if you need to like it's still like it doesn't taste good, but it's pretty good for you. And it's literally everywhere.
Doug:It's like a fucking Jim Brozzer.
Speaker 4:There's yeah.
Doug:This is the new crazy seven days of fucking meal prep. Just this shit.
Speaker 4:Yeah.
Doug:Just now only crawl.
Speaker 4:I'm gonna have to try this out. This is like the crawl is like if there's a family tree, this is where it starts. The crawl kind of produces the other, the crawls that come.
Doug:Honestly, sure I don't, I don't like that.
Speaker 5:I don't like that, nope.
Speaker 4:I don't like that, but the one of the other species, that there's a video about cooking this dog.
Speaker 5:Are you fucking with me?
Doug:Yeah, I cover it. It's fun, we'll get there.
Speaker 4:There's a species that comes off of the crawl, like, literally, it falls off, the crawl will produce these meat nodes that fall off and that produces the next thing that I'm gonna talk about, which is called the trimmings.
Speaker 1:I love a really mean now, every time, every fucking time.
Speaker 4:I hear about the trimmings. I immediately think of that robot chicken skit about lemmings. Oh God, oh, they're all jumping off the fucking yes. Now trimmings, essentially they are those meat nodes. They fall off the crawl and they're really tiny. They're tiny little fuckers and they just kind of skedaddle away from the crawl and they literally eat anything at first to survive. Anything they can get a hold of, they will eat their pests.
Speaker 1:They're basically and I'm gonna get to it. They're basically furthest raccoons.
Doug:They are meat raccoons.
Speaker 4:Now they start off very small and they only grow about the size of a basketball. They don't get very big much like a raccoon do, and they literally look like a skinless raccoon. It looks like a red flesh raccoon. Now, the nice thing about these things is it has a lot of similarities to a raccoon. They're very skittish, they're not like temperamental. They're more scared of you than you are of them and they're scavengers like people. It literally says that people. They've started become more of an annoyance to people because they'll find them late at night rummaging through their trash. These things are fucking raccoons, that's all they are. And it's even like some people keep them as pets.
Speaker 4:You know, like raccoons, because some people keep raccoons like weirdos, and I should note I don't think I noted it in the first episode it also mentioned. I'll fucking note it now this all of this just started in the year 1931. Uh-huh, just boom, we got some weird fleshy shit going on.
Speaker 5:So no one knows why. Normal normal, normal fleshy, weird tubes.
Speaker 4:War, war one, no, no, great depression going into world war two and then bam flesh. That's what. I know that you're.
Doug:Before that but nope, I'm right.
Speaker 4:So, nope, nope, you would think great 1930 is the Great Depression. These things, because of how like Defenseless they are and how weak they are, they're quite literally on the bottom of the food chain, the. The video shows us that these things are even below rabbits when it comes to the chain and they get picked off by predators and shit so fucking often. And you're probably thinking, wow, this thing sounds like it sucks, wouldn't you think that it's like, uh, that their numbers would be on the decline.
Doug:That was literally the first note I put in my notes when I was watching this because I was like what are these things? Point like Evolutionarily, why do these things keep existing? They?
Speaker 5:Yeah, they actually have a very, very, very good point.
Speaker 4:Yeah and um. Essentially it's like yeah, no, don't worry, because the crawl is just always making these things always like the crawl just produces them.
Speaker 5:They're like chicken nuggets that you have to catch well, well eat.
Doug:Yeah, I don't know if you actually mentioned this during your crawl section, but the crawl actually like like Uh, up ticks the rate of like pretty much everything growth.
Doug:Yeah, crops, yeah, life around it.
Doug:a bit of time like Explaining that, yeah, okay, good, that's great, now we'll make sure we really hammer home that point. Just if you forgot in the last 10 minutes, because we've been so not on track if you drink as much as we do.
Speaker 5:Yeah, here's your reminder.
Speaker 4:Something I want to bring up. In the first video. I didn't bring it up because I couldn't read it. There's a little I can't read real quick.
Speaker 5:You're not. You're not wrong.
Speaker 4:There's a real quick glitch and then you see a little newspaper article and I can't read what it says. But in this one I caught it. You can find a newspaper article and it's real fast and all it mentions is that there's mass trimming infestations that are going on. So people are pretty pissed about these things, as being around and I wouldn't I don't blame them like these will be annoying. I imagine this, a family of these do, plus a family of raccoons Promising around your suburb when they started talking about these and like equating them to raccoons, but then they like have they go.
Speaker 5:Like they play a sound clip at some point of what they sound like at night or when they're like active. Oh yeah, holy fucker.
Doug:What I would blow reminds me of the noise from uh resident evil the village when that like yes, that's what it sounded like absolutely not Just done and people are like, yeah, I want to keep these things as a pet.
Speaker 5:Why yeah, I would love a husky making these noises at night Fuck.
Speaker 4:No, no, that's the best. What are you talking about?
Speaker 5:I want a husky, but I won't get one because they scream too much and these things like no. It's like a baby that has four sets of vocal cords and no skin. It's terrible. I love that.
Speaker 4:Well then so next video? Next video we move on to is the other category from that Basically spawns from the crawl, and it is called the meat snake. Yes, now the meat snake is birthed and it's only a couple centimeters long. They're very tiny, look more like worms than the snake. They're growers.
Speaker 5:But these fuckers oh, they're definitely growers because they can get up to 16 feet. Long more than that. They're fucking massive.
Speaker 4:Um they're, they can get bigger, but on average they get to 16 feet. They can get bigger if there's things like natural disasters, war or plagues that can happen um.
Speaker 1:Reason being. We'll get into that for a second part of this video.
Speaker 4:Yeah, there's 100.
Doug:These things will become more populated when these things happen in one of the both places is war no explanation.
Speaker 4:Yeah, the fucking operation desert storm happens. There's a bunch of meat snakes going around Are the meat snakes going to war?
Speaker 1:Yeah, there's so many meat snakes? Why?
Speaker 5:war is a foot. What don't worry about?
Speaker 4:it. What is it good for War, were declares Um so these meat snakes, we find out they typically eat. Uh like they. They eat dead bodies, essentially.
Speaker 5:They eat just dead flesh dead things, dead flesh.
Speaker 4:Yeah, they eat dead things. They don't eat live things, they eat dead things and they have much like a regular snake and it's like heat sensing tongue. It's got its own little tongue appendage thing that senses like the, the particles of, like dead Things decaying flesh.
Speaker 5:It's like the fucking rotting particles in the air.
Speaker 4:What a terrible such thing and it can guide it.
Speaker 5:What a fucking terrible superpower like oh, that's my dead flesh.
Speaker 4:I wonder the other superpower, I can taste it. So how this thing can, mike?
Doug:I just want to say your mom is in the discord talking about meat snakes growing right now.
Speaker 5:Yeah, she says you know meat snakes do grow if you guys want to come join the conversation.
Speaker 1:Enjoying uh.
Speaker 5:Mike, mike's mom, jernene, talk about some meat snakes.
Speaker 4:Uh yeah just hit up our discord, the booze.
Speaker 5:Why the booze is here. Oh my god, what are we drinking? What do we think there's a bottle here and it's empty?
Doug:Yeah, this is four roses four roses again Cool Uh anyway.
Speaker 4:so this meat snake, okay, bye. Yeah, you're not go ahead, jason. What are you drinking? It doesn't matter.
Speaker 5:I'm having a high life because I can't. I don't want to try.
Speaker 4:Drinking it. Uh, the champagne, champagne of beers, nice class, champagne of the the, the prince of beers reminds me of college.
Doug:What are you drinking? Mook, absolutely no.
Speaker 4:Hell yeah, hell yeah.
Speaker 5:he's hydration boy, he's drinking what more is good for so?
Speaker 4:when these meat snakes eat dead flesh, they release this chemical in their body and that chemical basically breaks down Uh, the nutrients that they need, and then it leaves behind the shit that they don't need, like finger fingernails, pelvic bone, skulls, things like that. Is it giddy up 409. Now it It'll take these leftover bits. It'll take these leftover bits that it doesn't need, and them little. That'll go all the way to the end of the snake and just become part of the snake more snake.
Speaker 4:So all this leftover meat and bone and shit that I don't eat, um congrats, that's more snake, that's all these things keep getting bigger Congrats. You're probably wondering. Gross it eats the skull? Actually it doesn't. It wears it like fucking. Uh, what's his name? The, the serial killer guy, and he's like papa beast, oh, doesn't he?
Speaker 5:Anthony, yeah.
Doug:Hannibal Hannibal.
Speaker 4:Yeah, yeah, fucking, wearing faces like Hannibal or some shit. And, uh, it wears skulls. So each of these meat snakes can look different depending on you know what they last eight and where they are, things like that. Um, now, these meat snakes Are pretty common around, like civilization, I've noticed, because People will use these meat snakes in like butcher stops. They'll give them, like the leftover meat they're basically trash cans for butchers. Fucking zoos when, like, monkeys die, here you go, buddy, uh, battlefields. They will release these things on the battlefields to clean up.
Speaker 4:Uh, uh decaying bodies, because Nature's.
Speaker 1:Yeah, when these things eat bodies.
Speaker 4:Who's a good little meat. When these things eat bodies if it's like toxic meat or anything that it's eating it will like, basically basically cleanse it. Anything that comes out of this snake is no longer like infectious or full of disease. It the like decaying process in its gut but dissolves all of that away. So whatever comes out is clean Very concentrated meat oil.
Doug:Concentrated meat oil. That's awful, I hate that a lot.
Speaker 1:Um, now, these things are also known to live more meat For 28 years on average, I'm sorry.
Speaker 4:Why, though? Because they're so they have a healthy diet of dead, of just dead things are dead people. Yeah, yeah. Now you're probably wondering how can you kill this thing? Well, there's a couple ways you can kill it. Yeah, uh, it could starve to death.
Speaker 5:Well, it sounds like it only touches things that are dead. Is there a reason why we'd want to kill it?
Speaker 4:I mean, you don't want it to get too big, but why we kill things that don't want to hurt us all the time things for being big.
Doug:Whales yeah, that's what coaching is. That's fair. Yeah, that's fair. That was a stupid question.
Speaker 4:That was a dumb question.
Speaker 5:That's my fault. Yes, it was.
Speaker 4:Anyway. So you can burn it, apparently, and you can destroy the meat snake coating. What does that mean? You ask so many physical properties is jarring. Yeah, I don't fully understand what the meat snake coating is, but you can use that to kill it. Okay, good, it's the flip skin. It's well it's, it's, it's like uh, it's the meat skin.
Speaker 5:It's like a hyper thick connective tissue membrane. That just covers the whole thing.
Speaker 4:Oh so destroy that.
Speaker 5:Yeah, we all. We have the same thing in between our, our skin and our muscles, but apparently this is like 200 times as thick, so I know, maybe this will also come up again later.
Doug:Yeah couple of times.
Speaker 4:Yeah, now the meat snake. So far is the only meat snake, ironically, ironically, it's the only uh species from vita carnus to Reproduce by like.
Doug:I wouldn't say breeding, of course the meat. No, it's not reading.
Speaker 5:It's masturbation, if anything.
Speaker 4:It's, it's like it's an amoeba, it it separates from itself like a nuclei, mitosis, mitosis, and it creates another meat snake and they just go their separate way. That's how they reproduce. It's mitosis, mitosis.
Doug:Hey me, I say that, but I don't know if that's the correct word.
Speaker 5:No, it's mitosis.
Speaker 4:Now these things are typically they look ugly as shit, but they're also pretty docile.
Speaker 1:They're not like aggressive unless you're fucking with it trying.
Speaker 4:Yeah, unless you're fucking with it trying to eat, it's pretty much going to leave you alone and it's pretty tameable Like it's not that big a deal.
Doug:Like don't try to sex up a snake, a meat snake.
Speaker 4:But that's going to lead us onto it doesn't consent the final boy for my research here. The last video is on a subcategory of Vita Garnes called the Mimics.
Speaker 1:This is the scariest video in the entire series 100 fucking percent.
Speaker 4:Now Mimics, they pop off of the crawl and they look-.
Doug:If you watch any single video from the series, go watch this one.
Speaker 4:Yeah, it is pretty good. They pop off of the crawl and they resemble at first the trimmings, just a little smaller and with less legs. Trimmings usually have like six appendages. These guys have four, and they look a little skinnier too. As they get bigger they start to resemble a humanoid figure, just with more extended, like longer fingers, they have longer limbs and they have bulging eyes. So we're looking at a meaty person, which doesn't sound weird until you see a meaty person Now, this thing's mouth full of was it incisors?
Speaker 5:Mostly incisors, I want to say some mullers and bicuspids near the back.
Speaker 1:And they go down there, they make it a point.
Doug:Yeah, fangs in the throat. Well, we'll get to that.
Speaker 4:So they make a point to mention that the has his teeth, because it is the perfect teeth for gripping and ripping flesh In large chunks.
Speaker 5:In large chunks, in large chunks. So you're probably swallowing those chunks whole.
Speaker 4:Yeah, yes. Now these things love to live around the meat it's got the meat glug for you. Now these things love to live in more densely populated areas with people. And you're probably wondering to yourself, michael, why does it want to live in places with people? What do you mean? It's food, is people, it eats people. Everything up until this point, eats dead things. These guys, on the other hand, they hunt only people. And they do a big serial killer about it. They don't even just attack you like a pack of wolves.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 4:No.
Doug:They fucking follow you yeah they like Ted Kaczynski you or something they're fetish. The psychological torment.
Speaker 5:They watch you for weeks, they get your routine down, they wait until you're vulnerable.
Speaker 4:Yes, and then they suck your dick before they kill you.
Speaker 4:So these things? They'll go into places populated by humans and they will pick out one target and they will stalk that target until that target is at its weakest point, which is typically when you're in bed, sleeping, and that is when it kills you. So it will follow you around. Imagine being going to work one day and you just notice some creepy looking guy down the street and you're like huh, weird and you get on the train and then you just take the train all the way to work. You're nine to five and then you get back on the train and you notice, hey, is that fucking creepy guy again? And then you get off the train and you're driving and then you look in the river and mirror and two miles down you see this guy just shackling and just shumbling towards you and it's like the fuck is up with this homeless man. Why is he following me home?
Doug:Where is he. And then you get home.
Speaker 4:Where is he, because he's shinned and then you get home and he kills you because you've been outside your window, breathing heavily outside the window watching you Because you're trying to watch the latest episode of fucking Sex in the City. The new bit that's out, which is bad. The new season, which is like say less, or whatever it's called, it's not good.
Speaker 1:This is going in a direction.
Speaker 4:We did not expect it to. Yeah, anyway. But while we're getting all this information, it's still in that like PowerPoint slideshow ask mannerisms. But we cut now to this like found footage style video of someone like frantically trying to hide in what looks like their house and they like stash it's at night and they like stash themselves in like a closet and they do the foolish thing of trying to hide, oh my God. But also leaving their flashlight on full blast Real quick before you go forward.
Speaker 5:I think it adds to the creepy factor. But one thing the video did say before this like found footage style video comes up is that the mimics will always wait until you are either sleeping or cornered. And they would, they would, they will calculate it and they will make sure you have nowhere to go and then they will attack you.
Doug:Yeah, they basically will leave you alone unless you are completely vulnerable, yep.
Speaker 4:And have nowhere to run. It's that psychological shit?
Doug:Yes, and you needed another reason to just be totally paranoid.
Speaker 4:It's like it. It's like it thrives off fear, because if you have a way, if you have an exit strategy and a way out, it will leave you alone, yep. But if you're cornered, it will just fucking mock you. Yeah, I could kill you. Yeah, like this one. And then, yeah, then it flashes to the video, and the video is someone hiding in the closet Again makes the foolish mistake of not turning their bright ass flashlight off when something's trying to kill them. And they're just sitting in the closet and you just see the closet door just creak open slightly. Oh, you see these like long, meaty fingers. Just he'll go elegantly caress just caress the door.
Doug:Looking to the yeah.
Doug:I just want to say that they're they're in this closet for like a good while before it like, and you just hear it all happening but, you don't see anything for a while in the background you hear this thing kind of shuffling around like it like it's looking like. You hear every step it takes towards this.
Doug:That's the thing though it's not looking.
Speaker 5:It's just waiting, and it's just exactly where you are.
Speaker 4:Yeah, because that's the thing. It's edging you. Yeah.
Doug:That's the thing, though, is like you, when this thing shows up, you know your fuck because you know it's already thought it. You know you have no way out because you know it's already thought about it. Yep.
Speaker 1:As long as you know about these things habits.
Speaker 5:that's oh my God, that's a fucking nightmare.
Speaker 4:You see, you see its fingers, and then it, the camera pans up a little bit and you see, it's just, it's dead like half, it's just its eye.
Doug:It's just these cold, dead eyes.
Speaker 4:It kind of looks like a Titan from Attack on Titan. Yes, it looks like. It looks like when they chip away at the wall in season one and it's like, oh my God, they're in the wall. It looks like that.
Doug:Spoilers. The other thing is they're, they're, they're grinning like they have this big dumb fucking grin on their face.
Speaker 4:Oh yeah, they talk about that too, yeah it's got a grin on their face and they they make a point to say it's just a coincidence. This is how their skull is built. Yeah.
Doug:It's fucking. This is being a thing.
Doug:Yeah, I don't know if they made this suit out of like paper mache or like how, but it's.
Speaker 4:I mean it's CG.
Doug:It's so good. No, I don't think it's CG.
Speaker 5:Oh my God, no, no, no, no no, some of the pictures.
Speaker 4:Oh, you're talking with the video.
Doug:Yeah, oh yeah, if you guys have watched any of like of Dear David.
Speaker 5:It looked very similar to some of the things that were used in that, and that's something we'll cover.
Doug:Yeah, at some point we can talk about that later, but it looks really fucking scary.
Speaker 4:It doesn't yeah. Now it's so Now you're probably wondering. You're probably wondering. You're probably like Mike. That sounds terrifying. It gets worse. This thing can evolve like a Pokemon. Oh yeah, it can go into two different stages. If it is in a place that is like abundant of like, basically if it lives in the city. If it gets to the city and there's a fuckload of people around, it'll morph itself to look like a person. And it will become.
Doug:There's like two steps, though, so if they're eating enough they'll become like like an elder mimic or whatever they call it no.
Speaker 4:Yeah, that's the next one. I'm getting to that one. Well, that one's before. No, no.
Speaker 5:So what Mike is saying is that these, the regular mimics, will actually take things like clothing and drape it over themselves to like help conceal their super skinless body, just to like blend in with society and stuff like that.
Speaker 4:Yeah, see, there it is, but anyway. So if you're living in the city, there's a bunch of people around you. It'll dawn. It'll dawn human clothing, it'll grow hair and it will become indistinguishable from another person, and that is how it feeds Well.
Speaker 5:The other one that one doesn't feed From what the video said, though, that one doesn't feed from the two evolutionary branches, there's one that goes full up like mimics a human, but doesn't quite eat them as much. It eats them more in secret, whereas the other one becomes like the apex human hunter, which and that's the one I'm getting to right now.
Speaker 4:Yes, so if you're this one's like, basically thriving in the city, this is essentially like I feel like in this world they're trying to pass off that like serial killers are these mimics? I got that vibe because these things stalk their prey. They're very psychological about it and now they just look like another human being.
Doug:Yeah, the one, the one you're talking about now is like almost indistinguishable from a human.
Speaker 4:They just look like another person. So in my mind, like I feel like that part of the lore here is, like in this world, serial killers are mimics.
Doug:Well, don't they say, though, that they're, even when they've reached like full, like person form, their limbs and shit are still fucked up, though.
Doug:Like there's like little tells yeah, there's definitely tells.
Speaker 4:They kind of contradict themselves a little because they say that they haven't you haven't watched all the videos.
Doug:I've watched my no in my video. No, I know, but there's a lot of things that are said about mimics a little later on. That's fine, I'm just saying.
Speaker 4:I'm just saying because, like, I don't want you to think that it's contradicting itself when there's a lot of random shit.
Doug:No, I mean in my video.
Speaker 4:it both says that there are some like attributes, like the long limbs and stuff. It'll stay still here, but then it also says it is indistinguishable from another human. That's fair.
Doug:So I'm like which is it? You know, how can you tell? Well, their eyeballs are like 14 meters wide.
Speaker 4:Yeah, but so the next evolution? The next evolution is if you have basically a mimic who engorges themselves, I guess would be a polite one to over eat.
Speaker 4:This thing basically becomes the Hulk of a mimic. It gets much larger, it loses its like like. It loses its like stealth mode, like it doesn't care as much. It goes like basically all black except the head. The limbs get longer, it gets stronger and the the body goes basically jet black. The face stays the same, except the eyes are more hollow. The mouth all the teeth in the mouth go down to the throat, so it's just a toothless grin. And that reminded me of snapping turtles, because snapping turtles have all their teeth in the throat, for when they catch jellyfish they can't come out. Gross, fascinating stuff.
Speaker 4:But you're looking at the goddamn apex predator right here, because this fucking thing just stalks you in the night and it will just beat the shit out of you. It'll just sit in the dark. You come around, it bonks you and eats you, like it doesn't get any creepier than that. And it's to the point where, like there's a PSA on what to do if these things come around. And it's like if you come across a mimic, you know this is what you're going to want to do. And it's like okay, let's, let's hear what I want to do here. And it's like first, don't, don't be by mimics Don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't don't.
Speaker 4:It's like don't be by mimics man. It's basically like don't walk around at night by yourself, because you're going to get caught. Okay, sure. And then it's like number two If you see the mushroom cloud.
Doug:It's already too late. It's already too late.
Speaker 4:Basically. Yeah, it's like two. If you see a mimic just chilling, not doing anything, just slowly back up, like it, like it'll just get out of there because it may not have noticed you, so just just get out of there, are you a bear? And it's like three Dude. Yeah, it might be a bear.
Speaker 5:Shocking Mimics and bears. Exactly the same way is what I've learned from these videos.
Speaker 4:Why doesn't everyone just carry around mimic repellent?
Doug:I don't understand well, I Would just as a blood, all Really hard and then it'd be like oh, that guy shit himself.
Speaker 4:I don't want to look like you can kind of do that here, because the next one is if you're cornered by a mimic and you have no way out, go to the fetal position, scream really loud and hope that other people come to your aid face so you can essentially shit yourself, I'll probably help feet you know, protect your vital organs that it will of eventually get to and then the next one Is hey, if you got like a weapon, like a gun or something, don't use it, because these things are super durable and the gun or won't back any weapon you have is useless.
Speaker 5:Anything, how durable my question for later.
Speaker 4:It's like, if you're gonna use this weapon for anything, use it as like a barrier between you and the mimic, because that's all.
Doug:I thought you were gonna say use it on yourself God.
Speaker 1:It's easier this way and it's like it's like step six.
Speaker 4:If you are in a position where a mimic is like looking for you, hide, hide behind like your couch, hide under your bed, do what you can. And they even bring up a point. They're like hide from this mimic, because a mimic, it's like hide from this mimic. And then you know, make your way out, make your way to the exit, whatever you can, because a mimic isn't going to sit around and wait for you if it knows you have an exit strategy. They basically make it a point to say A mimic isn't going to hang around forever. If you hide and it knows that you can leave it's, it's gonna leave you alone. They are only going to attack you if it's a certain. If it's a, if it's your foot, if it's 100% certain, kill. That's the only time it's gonna fuck with you other than that those is let you go.
Speaker 4:Yeah, so that, my friends, is the mimic. The mimic now me, me see now. Now, the mimics are fucking terrifying. I think that was the scary like moose as the scariest part. There's a part so like footage video where the door they're just banging on the door yeah, kind of makes your heart jump a little because it says it's like the mimic will make sounds.
Doug:Yes, tension of terrifying you. And then there's like that knocking noise is like, like in one channel of the audio. I was watching this at like nine o'clock at night alone in my house.
Speaker 5:I Fucking hate, yeah, but.
Speaker 4:Those are my.
Speaker 1:Videos that hands now the nice thing is the nice thing.
Speaker 4:The nice thing is, um, with all the distractions and the interruptions, we're 48 minutes in and only four videos deep. Hell yeah so Mike talked a lot. I will let you guys take over. We're gonna pause.
Doug:Yep, I'm here.
Speaker 5:Okay, all right, we run Zowie.
Doug:Robert Bob's Albert bow, wow, yeah, so that's great.
Speaker 4:We, we, we, we learned about some we stumbled through those first four videos very nicely, and I'm gonna make mine a lot shorter.
Doug:You people made them long. That's, that's fair, I guess. So the fifth uh the fifth video that we get is about the harvesters.
Speaker 5:Now I love this one.
Doug:I know, these guys are dope. I, this thing is just some meat plant and I love it. Yep, it's a meatball. So this thing it literally is. It's just a giant meatball on the ground with tentacles that fucks everything up.
Speaker 1:Um, so it's got large masses, yeah, pretty much.
Doug:Where's the mom meatball, anyways, uh, large bulbous mass, all right, just like, imagine like a meatball, like an actual meatball, like that's in the shape of an egg, I guess meat egg, yeah, meat egg, meat egg, and it's got these big long tendrils that grow underneath the ground. Um, and Basically, these are made when a node, a meat node, on a crawl, becomes so big that it never actually falls off and then the crawl actually turns into uh, this it's a meat. To me it's a meat eating to a.
Doug:Um, so the tendrils that it has that are under the ground, have these like big, thick, like teethy spines on them? Um, that, help it catch its prey. If you are hit by these tendrils, it will cause paralysis and it will stop your blood from clotting so that essentially any wound you have you will just bleed out completely from it has got a 100% Fatality rate.
Doug:Um, it is not great. It's a crit kill if I've ever seen one. So once it's got you in its tendril, um, these secondary tendrils come out of the ground and essentially just a move penis. Be beinus, um being. Basically they come out of the ground and they just start like kind of like thrashing you around to like basically Get the rest of your blood out of you dude.
Speaker 4:There's so many better ways to do that than just I don't. I don't care, like out of all of these fucking entities. This one, literally, to me anyway, was the most like savage, because oh yeah, it just basically does paralyzes low key thing to you, yeah it paralyzes the shit out of you and makes us you can't know exactly what it's doing.
Doug:Oh yeah, this description just made just made me think of a new one that they should implement, and it's basically just like a meat centrifuge that you fall into.
Speaker 5:It's the gravatron, but Biological that'd be fucking amazing.
Doug:It's a meat carnival ride.
Speaker 4:Finally, a meat particle accelerator. Oh my god, is that's what we needed?
Speaker 5:There's an analog horror the uh the meat carnival, oh my god that's definitely flesh pit adjacent.
Doug:Um, all right, so, yeah. So, basically, like I said, these secondary spines, they, they come up and basically clean up the carcass that's left on the ground, like once it's dead, and pulls it into the ground so that the, the crawl and the harvester can feed off of it, because the blood basically Populates everything that is in this species. Um, they thrive off blood. Yeah, so the spines on this thing, they only go for large animals, um, and they theorize that the reason for this is is because they'll have, like, let's say, a bunny comes by, the spines of the harvester aren't going to go for the bunny because they want the bunny to attract larger prey to the area which it then can feed off of. So it's, it's that, that whole.
Doug:Like uh it's like a fvenous flytrap. Well, yeah, and it's that theme of, like the circle of life is kind of like, yeah, happening, so you've got, you've got your crawl, populating the area with prey and predators, and then you have the harvester feeding off of that and it's that like continuous chain that we're seeing, from the crawl to the mimics to the harvester. You know, I'm like Each one seems to have that its own purpose, its own like reason for what it does. Um and uh, as we move on, you'll see a lot of the crazy, crazy, crazy craziness that is these species. Um, but uh, at the four minute and 12 minute mark on this or the four, minute.
Doug:That did not make sense. Four minute and 12 second mark uh of this video. Uh, there's like this flash that you have to like really fucking work for to fucking see, uh, but it's a newspaper article and basically what it says is family attacked by harvester, while hiking Authorities refused to handle the issue, only put up warning signs. So essentially the authorities won't, didn't do anything about this. A harvester killed a whole family and all they did was put up some signs saying there's a harvester in the area. Good, like, don't go here now.
Doug:I guess very good, it's the harvester's territory maximum effort Awesome.
Doug:Yeah, um, but yeah, I mean, I'm in a nutshell the harvester's are are you gonna get rid?
Speaker 4:of it. It's underground. What do you want me to do?
Doug:It's it's got spiky tendrils as far as we know, they don't move, they're just kind of placed in the ground case. Yeah, it does say if you're like, um, if you happen to be uh in the area and you think there's a harvester around, uh, you should probably throw your shit uh at the ground to like have the tendrils snap at it so you can start like this does take big like swat or uh crab, just throw all your shit at it and get the fuck up out of there um, because, like I said, it only goes for big, big, uh pray, and I guess you know, be it, be like a deer, a human, a bear, whatever it is, it doesn't really give a shit.
Doug:It's gonna get you. If you weigh x amount over whatever you know, that sets off its tendrils. So, uh, but yeah, that's the harvester they're. They're pretty badass meatballs, if I do say so myself.
Speaker 4:Um, yeah, I love those things, it's the tendrils, the spaghetti to the meatball, that is the harvester.
Doug:Yeah, pretty much. Uh, this is where.
Speaker 1:Scientology formed.
Doug:Yeah, fucking watch the South Park episode. Yeah all right, so the next episode we get is documentary six the host of influence. This, I think, might be my favorite monster that they have. It's pretty.
Speaker 5:It's just so weird.
Doug:It's so. It's so, it's just so weird. I don't even know, except so most people call it the host. But what it does is it's a semi humanoid creature. From about the waist up, its lower part is basically comprised of tendrils that are like stuck in the ground that basically keep it, like you know, bolted to the ground, even though it is mobile, but it's very, very slow. So it has these like weird, like hollow hairs that are on its back. And these hollow hairs they kind of look like, you know, spines almost, but they're like really, really thin. What they do is they produce a spore and this thing will release spores into the air and they are super, super hazardous to like human life. It doesn't, as far as I know, affect animals, but what it does is these spores will travel super long distances and if a human was to ingest the spore or breathe in the spores, basically what will happen is the person will start to get really sick Worth noting.
Speaker 5:And the spores are like this, almost like curry, like colored, like yellowy brown.
Doug:Yeah, like, yeah. It's like a gross, like shit color.
Speaker 5:It looks like the color of fish food.
Doug:Like, yeah, sure. So if you happen to get this disgustabug into you, you're going to be, you're going to see some like notable, you know symptoms, which is restlessness, sluggish movements, numbness, lack of coordination, and this is going to happen, for you know, a good 24 to like you know, 36 hours or something like that.
Speaker 4:Spores called forums. This is my right man.
Doug:Yeah. So once you go past that like 24 hour mark after getting sick, it's going to turn into dizziness, migraines, impaired speech and what they label as trembles. I got the trembles. I got the trembles, ma yeah, so you might even notice your fellow you know people around you exempting these fellow friends like exude yeah like.
Doug:You'll see them, kind of like this. However, the last thing that happens is, once you've gotten to this point in the sickness, you will just start walking straight towards the host. I'm down with the sickness. You just won't stop. You will just keep walking towards them and walking towards them, and walking towards them, until you are face to face with this thing and it basically guts you and murders you and then feeds off of you.
Doug:Now, if someone was to per chance, stop you from walking and took you to I don't know, let's say, a hospital or something, you could recover and you would no longer be sick. I think they said it took like 36 hours or something and you'll be back to normal. For the most part, you'll get over the infection from the spores that you've got in your system. Now, this thing is kind of crazy and the way it looks in the videos is really cool too. This thing is super rare and there's only been one person, I guess, that's gotten an actual photo of this thing ever. So very, very rare. But they are like these long range murderers, which is kind of a really cool idea.
Speaker 1:They have a death note. Honestly, I'm like they do. They have a death note.
Speaker 5:Dude those pictures. They just sneeze at you. I was so curious about the story around those photos that exist. You know what I mean. They just seem like they're out in the middle of fucking nowhere. Who does that?
Doug:Yeah, it's just like chilling in the snow. Yeah, I don't know. That kind of tweaks me out, just the whole fact that they can shoot their spores and they just travel long distance who knows how many people they could.
Speaker 4:You could be enjoying a wonderful vacation in Sandals, jamaica, and then, all of a sudden, Sandals, jamaica.
Doug:Drabbing your new car.
Speaker 4:Into the woods where a host is. Oh my God, that was a host. The guy that hosts, say Jack.
Doug:You're a host, he's a host Jack Patsack, jack Patsack.
Doug:He's a host, it all comes full meat circle.
Speaker 5:Pat Jack Love it.
Speaker 4:Sack Jack.
Doug:Sack Pat Jackerack Bang-a-Rank. Yeah, but that's pretty much it Bang-a-Rank. That's pretty much it for the host of Influence. This thing is pretty Narnar for Sharshar. The next thing is even more Narnar for Sharshar. The next thing is called the Monolith. These guys are very new, only showing up at about 1971, which is about 40 years after the crawl of originally first showed up just out of the blue that one day there's only seven of these things that exist. There are seven Monoliths. They're fucking huge.
Speaker 1:It's fucking siren head.
Doug:Yeah, pretty much. They're like 120 meters in height. They're just comprised. The way they look is they're just a meat tree trunk and they pretty much are in the shape like a human shape, essentially like long legs, a torso, a head that is actually a upside down triangle with a hole in it, and then its arms are just like a mass of tendrils, it looks like a wireframe figure that you would have made in high school.
Doug:Meat shadow of the Colossus.
Speaker 5:The meaty shadow of the Colossus, yeah, yeah exactly Now.
Doug:They simply kind of stand around and do nothing, and they've actually only done something one time, One time yep and basically.
Speaker 4:I will do nothing, but I'll do something once.
Doug:Yeah.
Speaker 4:Boy, will you not like what I'm gonna do that?
Doug:one time. So basically what happened was, when they showed up, the government was like well, that ain't right. Huh, what's up with that? What?
Speaker 5:is it?
Doug:I don't know how you'd barely, but that don't seem right to me Perfect rendition.
Doug:That's not okay. So, yeah, they go over to them and they're like what's up, my guys. And they're like the fuck is that they didn't like that at all, so they let out this big EMP blast. Apparently. What did?
Speaker 4:the fuck did they do? They were just like fuck it, hit the fuck. Fuck it, hit the fucking button.
Doug:I don't know. So the government gets close to these things and these big meat monoliths.
Speaker 5:Why are they southern?
Doug:EMP blast.
Speaker 5:What? Never mind, keep going. I'm getting hung up on the wrong fucking details. Yeah, that's fair.
Speaker 4:Well, you think that is Billy, I don't know. Shoot it.
Doug:See what it does.
Doug:Why are they standing?
Speaker 1:there, that's one big ass slim Jim.
Speaker 4:Get a fork, Timmy. I want to see what happens.
Speaker 1:What happens? Sorry, Doug.
Doug:Well, they're just really big and they just stand around and do nothing. Well, what fur.
Speaker 4:This is what the government sounds like for some reason.
Doug:That is Well.
Speaker 5:God, don't make no jump Billy.
Doug:Yeah, I don't make no jump.
Speaker 1:It must be purpose. It'll read in fur All right, we'll rewind it a little bit here.
Doug:So all part of the play. So these big meat titans essentially let out an EMP blast and the government's like, oh shit. So they're like we're going to shoot some fucking rockets at them. So they shoot these giant fucking rockets and the monoliths essentially take a bunch of damage and then just recover super quick. Oh.
Doug:Nina yeah.
Doug:So their flesh is gone, and then it just like reformed.
Speaker 5:Oh, they got Wolverine. Oh yeah, oh yeah.
Speaker 4:They got Piccolo power. Yeah, do they go? Huh, and then it comes back.
Speaker 5:You want to see some cool you hear like a huh.
Doug:From this giant tower. So I will say this video is actually a lot shorter than a lot of the videos, but it's because they don't know like we don't really know much about the monoliths. The only thing that we really can discern from this is that there's seven of them and they're in this like about a mile diameter circle from each other.
Doug:Oh, don't like that they're all surrounding one area that's actually redacted in the video. We don't know what that is and that's it. That's all they give us about the monoliths. They're these giant beings in a circle in redacted, and that's kind of all we get. We know that they got very angry one time and then the government chained off the area they were in and they're like we're going to just let you guys do your thing Y'all a while now. Right now Y'all are scary as fuck and we don't know how to deal with that.
Speaker 4:So now did the government just like throw its wallet at these things, Like I'm sorry, here's my money.
Doug:They actually gave it a milk cart and they're like take my milk.
Speaker 5:They put a fucking fence up and said, like nobody go near these things.
Speaker 4:Maybe they won't go here. They put a giant fence up If they can't see us. They don't exist.
Speaker 5:Yeah, right, if we put 200 meters.
Doug:Yeah, yeah.
Doug:They just had no way. They were just like I don't know Just don't go by. There's a fence.
Speaker 5:Just don't do it.
Doug:People listen right. So now, if you were to watch this in order, you'd watch, you know, episode one through seven of this documentary and you'd get all of the creatures. But if you were paying attention, that graph that they keep showing, there's a slot for another creature but there isn't a singular video for that creature. Now, if we go to the full footage upload of the living meat research documentary, we actually do get an entry for the very final creature, but it's only specifically in the reupload of everything as one whole documentary.
Speaker 5:Which, honestly, that fact right there is actually a pretty important fact just to take note of, I think it is.
Doug:I think it is. It's important because it's something we're going to be focusing on a lot in the next episode. I want to say Next episode.
Speaker 5:I also feel like there's a certain I don't know how to say this without saying it. Genesecois it's a certain like disturbance electronically that might make more sense as more goes forward.
Doug:So now, compared to the other videos that we get, this one's a lot different. It doesn't look like a training video or like a. Here's the things you need to know. This thing that they're talking about is called the singularity, and now this thing who's talking about is given the standard Patrick dein spin. All we know about this is we know less about this thing than we do the monoliths, right. So it's a black orb that gives us a glow of, like luminous colors there's there's an absence of color, but then it also kind of emits all colors. It's typically found suspended in air by unknown forces and it's pretty much.
Doug:Any info that you could find on this has been said to be confiscated by officials, and not much is known to the general public. Now, what we do know is that sometimes it emits transmissions and sometimes electrical signals. That's all they give you in this. They there's a small little Blurb about it, and that's the info that's given on it. It's not very long, it's not a whole there. You really don't find out anything else other than that. However, this upload looks a lot different than the other uploads there is in a slideshow format for it. There's not a voice talking about it. Well, there's a voice talking about it, but it's not like the voice we're like used to hearing. It's almost like somebody else uploaded this like it wasn't supposed to be there, if that makes sense. I think that's kind of what Jason was trying to get at.
Speaker 4:We have a snowden.
Speaker 1:Now and things yeah, you know.
Doug:Obviously, the national meat research team Was doing their job to help us and we can only hope that they are going to keep information about this stuff. But that's it, that's it. That's all I have on that, because that's all we get. That's literally all we get in that. You just have to watch the whole like you go to the very end of the reupload and the singularity has its own little section at the very end and you can See what I'm talking about. Um, but this is where everything changes, friend, durst in it up.
Doug:So this is where everything changes. We get a new video called Vita Karnas cook at home kitchen.
Speaker 5:Do cheese crawl, pen a cook along this this was so Uncomfortable there is only one other video in this series that made me more uncomfortable than this fucking video.
Doug:The video is pretty funny. It's like you get like this, like it's like somebody's channel surfing right now while their channel surfing. I do want to bring up there is a Part before we hit the cooking channel where we see a Thing that says wanted by the CS IS Vincent Barrer. Keep that in mind.
Doug:Got himself into some trouble.
Doug:But, that being said, once they're done channel surfing, we get to a Cooking channel and basically it is how to cook a cheese crawl, penny, and that's it. It's really all it is. It's really funny. They're. Here's how. Here's what you need three cups of penny pasta, three cups of fresh crawl, one cup of cheese, a half cup of green onions, and then need some salt, some Cajun spice, parsley, dill garlic and some pepper.
Speaker 5:Is it just seriously?
Doug:just said cheese just cheese, cheese whatever just one cup whatever cheese, just breathe.
Speaker 5:If you got it, just fuck it.
Speaker 4:Yeah, you're eating a meaty tentacle and your concern is what cheese am I using?
Doug:it doesn't matter, because you're gonna just douse it with flavor enhancer.
Doug:Yeah, that's fair, exactly, and that's the most important part is that you need to have the flavor enhancer. We don't really know what that is right now Just other than the fact that it's just a flavor enhancer that comes from a company called new trier co.
Speaker 5:And you shouldn't let it get too hot.
Doug:Yeah, you need to apply it at below 60 degrees Celsius. Yeah, which?
Speaker 5:is. That's I mean to be fair. That's pretty, that's so pretty warm yeah.
Doug:Now, as you watch this, it's literally just like a six minute video of somebody just cooking.
Doug:Like you're literally just watching them cook with the dullest knife on the planet the dullest, like trying to cut the fucking crawl and he's like having a fucking like Conniption, trying to fucking change saw. I think the point is supposed to be like the crawl is really tough because they mentioned that. But then he goes and I thought that and then he went to cut the onions and I was like no, that knife is just dull as shit.
Doug:Now, other than the fact that we've mentioned this flavor enhancer, that's really important, but we have no info on it yet, so I'm not going to, you know, talk about it at all. The other big thing of importance that we need to talk about Is the fact that this man who is cooking or woman actually who's cooking this dish is wearing basically rubber gloves yeah, has Matt suit yeah, and wearing a respirator.
Doug:Yeah, that's good, yeah, that's good. So the respirator put.
Speaker 5:The respirator part is something that you should very specifically pay very close attention to here.
Doug:Like why in the piss would they need a respirator to cook this?
Speaker 5:You know what I'm saying and one other thing that I just I just want to make a point of it. What color is the? The stuff they throw on the food there Doug Like. That flavor enhancer like a yellowy brown orange.
Doug:Yeah, it's a good. Yeah, it's a yellowy brown, orange Kind of yeah just, it looks like a pap a paprika. Yeah okay, like a turmeric or a cumin, but yeah, maybe a cumin, maybe cumans, a better one, or a spore man.
Doug:Oh, uh, uh, uh. I don't know what I said.
Speaker 4:I said, yeah, it is a whore, yeah, they are. That that's what.
Speaker 5:I said this time of year. However, the.
Doug:This is this is the part in the episode when I regret to inform you that we were coming to an end and that the rest of this show over Over lights done.
Speaker 1:This is our last episode.
Speaker 5:Dude.
Speaker 4:There's no.
Speaker 5:There is no other way this show does not come to an end. It is like literally right before the important part of like a part two episode or something, let's pull, okay.
Doug:The final episode of deludy Cicada 30 30 one of my god, I ever see.
Speaker 5:Cicada 3301. Just know the end is nigh. That's the biggest fucking blue ball move we could ever be at the end of the episode.
Doug:Is Mike just going?
Speaker 5:Just abruptly Fuck.
Speaker 4:Yes, the bonus we let out that month is just 40 minutes of me just mumbling about a pissed. I am at that episode. Well, mike, you want to, you want to take us out here I'll take us out by saying if you want to support for other types of meaty boys, you can go to patreoncom, slash deludy pod or deludycom and you could chip in some sort of Currency that you wouldn't mind her and say a couple of fleshy men, and when you give us this currency, you yourself will receive some treasures.
Speaker 4:You'll get things like a bonus episode here and there, get live episodes that you can be a part of if you give a certain amount. Whoa, game nights that I would. I do a game night every month. We have one coming up here this week, but when this airs it'll be last week. So you figure that out. And then, yeah, you can also find us on all of our socials. If you go to deludycom as links to all our socials on there, link tree dot com, slash, deludy pod, all our links. You find us on Twitter, facebook, the Instagram's Check technically. Youtube technically, tick tock and you we're on YouTube.
Speaker 4:Literally just look up deludy pod or don't look under the internet everywhere and you will find this feet picks calm.
Speaker 4:Yeah, just look at deludy pod everywhere and don't look on the internet everywhere. Also, if you want to reach us, deludy pod at gmailcom, you can also reach us via our Google phone number, that is 630 909 9366. You can send us a text will respond. Or if you send us a phone number or, I'm sorry, a voice mail, we'll play it on the show 630 909 9366. We look forward to hear those. You might hear one at the end of this episode. Who fuck knows? Who fuck knows? I'll also go ahead and say you know there's a lot of flesh going on this episode. You know we haven't talked about too much as teeth. Teeth are great. My daughter's got a couple coming in. I got, and we did have a whole throat teeth segment, which sounds fantastic. Three and I gotta say thems is great. Our PO box is in the description of everything. Send us some teeth. There we go. Doug what you got.
Doug:We just renewed the PO box, so please, please make it Mega-mine DVDs worth it. This year we got maybe we got one package- hey man, we got return and one got returned that was on us. But, to be fair, still make it make it worth the money we spent on the PO box please.
Speaker 5:One of those packages did contain a pretty girthy dildo bottle opener with the looty that didn't even come to our PO box, that was hand delivered, oh yeah, that's true. I brought that never mind then. My point is moot almost literally actually it is.
Doug:Say people do anyways. Yeah, slap your peens against your beans, cleave them actually clean, clean, clean cleaver cleave beans cleave beans Nailed it moot say people, people people.
Speaker 4:What say you to people? People wise. Wise words from a wise man.
Speaker 1:Pull that.
Speaker 4:Jason say, say say.
Speaker 5:Stay like always, but also pull that pee when you can. And if you if you ever want to confuse people, just answer their question with a simple okay, I pull up a.
Speaker 4:Pull up, let's go.