My dad built a lab in his basement. He built monsters there. Can anyone help me? DLUTI! Wait... Help? Maybe not. Talk passionately about? Absolutely! Join Jason, Matt Doug, and Mike as we take a look at a very... strange YouTube series. If monster flicks are up your alley, this one may just be for you! Daisy Brown is here!
Daisy Brown
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Unplanned Podnancy
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Don't Look Under The Internet
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My dad built a lab in his basement. He built monsters there. Can anyone help me? DLUTI! Wait... Help? Maybe not. Talk passionately about? Absolutely! Join Jason, Matt Doug, and Mike as we take a look at a very... strange YouTube series. If monster flicks are up your alley, this one may just be for you! Daisy Brown is here!
Daisy Brown
Starting your own podcast? Use this link to receive a $20 Amazon gift card when you sign up for a paid account with Buzzsprout!
https://www.buzzsprout.com/?referrer_id=1671664
Linktree
Buy us a beer!
Join us in Discord!
DLUTI.com
Unplanned Podnancy
Undefined Graphics (Photography & Graphic Design)
Ghoulish Mortals
Inquiries: dlutipod@gmail.com
Don't Look Under The Internet
PO BOX 6437
Aurora IL 60598
Don't look under the internet.
Speaker 4:We can't.
Speaker 3:Shut up what's happening.
Speaker 5:I feel like I'm having a stroke.
Speaker 3:Do you remember that one time we just started fucking like talking about-.
Speaker 4:Just started fucking.
Speaker 3:Just started fucking in the middle of an episode. No, we started about ten Cloverfield. We were doing, asking why the fuck.
Speaker 4:Where the fuck do you get off right here? Yeah, exactly, the fuck's like what is happening. And then you did. We used to pre-plan ways to fuck with Mike like a lot more than we do now.
Speaker 5:Let's pick that back up. That's when we were happier and we liked each other. Honestly, yeah, when we liked each other, we didn't have to do anything else Before this was a job.
Speaker 2:This is a job. You guys are getting paid, Hello everyone.
Speaker 4:This now consumes my life.
Speaker 3:You guys are getting paid.
Speaker 4:I'd love if that were the case.
Speaker 3:Yes.
Speaker 4:Hello, everybody, welcome to.
Speaker 5:Don't Look Under the Internet.
Speaker 2:Good intentions.
Speaker 5:A show with four corporate stooges and some good intentions.
Speaker 4:Yes, that is Matt with a good demeanor.
Speaker 5:That's not actually Matt. That's Matt there it is there it is, that's Doug, that is me, that's Jason.
Speaker 3:Couldn't hear Doug, because he was filling his throat with my cock, hi.
Speaker 5:For those of you who don't know me, and I'm, yeah, we'll just leave it at that. Another type of fella.
Speaker 4:It's not enough to fill the whole mouth, so it's more like a yeah.
Speaker 3:It's like when you put a blade of grass between your thumbs and below.
Speaker 2:It's more like a whistle, it's like just popping up as this person.
Speaker 1:I'm going to go ahead.
Speaker 5:I'm going to go ahead and just start us off with a good old fashioned Ooh Got it Deloody Clap.
Speaker 4:Houseclap Recoom Up your butt.
Speaker 3:So, Recoom kick Names Recoom and it rhymes with doom Recoom.
Speaker 5:Thanks you For real for real.
Speaker 1:okay, for real for real boys. We don't have any patrons.
Speaker 4:Wow, unbelievable For real for real no cap under feet. Frfr no patrons.
Speaker 3:And here's the other thing.
Speaker 5:No new members on the website either.
Speaker 3:Our cash only patron.
Speaker 1:Okay.
Speaker 3:Our cash only patron managed to make it.
Speaker 2:It's probably because we removed the stuff that I like here and everybody was like fuck it, I'm out.
Speaker 4:Yeah, that's probably Speaking of, let me just give a recap, real quick, on what we've done so we're in the middle of revamping our Patreon.
Speaker 5:We've been revamping our Patreon.
Speaker 1:We have, but we're doing bigger and better things. Absolutely yeah.
Speaker 4:It's true, we have learned that bullying people in the Discord will get them to sub to the Patreon as well. However, what I'm here to tell you today is that we've we're revamping it. We haven't fully figured out what we're going to do yet, but we've simplified it for now. So if you were a $7 to Patreon all four of you we implore you to either move to the $5 tier or the $10 tier, your choice.
Speaker 5:Yep yes.
Speaker 4:So, story short, everything's the same, except the $5 tier now also gets all bonuses that we do Anything bonus wise, anything that is a bonus. The $10 tier has stayed the same. You get all the bonuses, the big, the big. Pick me up for the $10 tiers that you get.
Speaker 3:This live recording and so many of you have come out.
Speaker 2:You want a bonus? Give us $5.
Speaker 4:Top tier quality yeah.
Speaker 5:Which Game Night will be next week, the 15th Great Good discussion about that.
Speaker 4:So, but but and even you $10. If you want to move to the $5 tier, because you don't ever join the live episodes, that's fine.
Speaker 5:No, it's not. Don't do it. I need your money.
Speaker 4:No that's fine. Yeah, we're not here for the money. No, I am Give me your money. You can't hear me winking, but it's heavily winking.
Speaker 3:Your eyelids are pretty wet today.
Speaker 4:But if you do go to the $5 tier you'll miss all the cool fun stuff we have planned for the $10 tier that we don't know what is yet? Here's there you go.
Speaker 3:So Doug just did a very good job of making us look like we are competent people yeah here. So SCP was one of the big things for, like the paid content on Patreon. I do want to say that that is not going away completely, but I do want to make it very clear that that is editing. Those is like another full-time job for me, especially with this last round. There's a lot of moving parts for it and I'm realizing that I think I bit off way too much that I could chew. So, instead of just under delivering every fucking month over and over again, we're going to actually give you guys some stuff you can enjoy. We're going to give you guys some stuff that does not make us feel like we are dying on the inside before like every week.
Speaker 4:Pretty much you'll get bonus episodes that are a little bit more closely tied into the episode of the week. You'll hear us talk about what we would do and if we were in that certain world or whatever. It may be just kind of stuff like that, but you will get maybe a fucking hour and a half episode of us talking about movies like we like to do.
Speaker 3:Maybe we'll talk about a cryptic.
Speaker 4:No, probably not. Okay, fair enough. Probably won't do, that Probably won't do that no, unless, like a hundred of you, comment or share your interest in our email or something like that, that you want us to talk about cryptids again. We won't be doing that, and then other bit of yeah definitely the biggest house, I'm sure, but we'll reiterate it.
Speaker 2:The biggest house that we've kept.
Speaker 5:But I just want to reiterate I'm going to be TLDR Deludithon.
Speaker 2:Deludithon, Deludithon.
Speaker 5:We're going to be doing a fuckload of fun. Deludithon, deludithon, we're going to be doing a bunch of shit, so make sure that you're in on that Do we have a start time for that, march 23rd.
Speaker 2:Yeah, March 24th at 8am.
Speaker 1:March 23rd, 8am, deludithon, maybe it's all. Yeah, maybe closer to.
Speaker 5:Maybe screaming it all in the intro. So it's all good, yeah, and potentially oh that's right, that's right.
Speaker 4:Yeah, we have it in our intro. You'll see it plastered all over our socials like every day, so I don't fucking care.
Speaker 3:You knew about it, so be there or be square Deludithon is turning this new leaf where we actually We'll see how long it lasts. We'll see how long it lasts.
Speaker 4:So far, so good. We've been good. We're doing okay. We're doing okay.
Speaker 1:Yeah, we're not a bunch of monsters.
Speaker 5:What.
Speaker 1:There's one thing you can count on.
Speaker 3:It's the fact that bird scooters will never be getting any better on this show.
Speaker 5:That is a guaranteed fact.
Speaker 3:Nope, nope nope, nope, nope what are we talking about Mike?
Speaker 5:So, speaking of monsters, we're going to bird scooter into that. We are talking about a little known tidbit on the Twitter, but mostly on the YouTube most called.
Speaker 4:Daisy Brown Brownington of the days.
Speaker 3:Fact. I could also say it that way.
Speaker 5:Daisy's Brown, that's not something.
Speaker 4:That's the porn version my friend man.
Speaker 5:Daisy, what's like what's? A euphemism for butthole Brown spy.
Speaker 2:Daisy's Brown spy. Somebody renamed the outline yesterday to Daisy's Brown line.
Speaker 3:I saw it while I was shitting and I was like this has to be changed. Brown, right, it's full circle. Brown and earlier brain.
Speaker 5:Yeah, anyway, yeah, we're talking about Daisy Brown, so it's a good one.
Speaker 1:It's a one, it's a town.
Speaker 5:It's a one.
Speaker 3:Let's get into this one that we're going to talk about today, by Metallica.
Speaker 5:No, we don't talk about that here. No, no, no, don't even start. They're notorious for copyright. Strike at people, don't even say their names. Shit, I already did say, there is a spoof on Instagram that I found of Metallica and it's like what if they're a gay? And it's just like.
Speaker 1:I am really gay.
Speaker 5:Are you so damn gay, jesus? Hell yeah, this is great.
Speaker 1:My mouth is for penis suction.
Speaker 3:One of the things that I need you to do. Yes, I can say I'm going to need you to go ahead and get in contact with Bare Force One, and then I'm going to need you to get permission for us to play their song, bare Force.
Speaker 1:One Bare Force and on the show.
Speaker 3:And then you're just going to break down every thought that you have about that.
Speaker 5:I love Bare Force One. What is that? Yeah, none of us has. Anyway, we're off topic, so where?
Speaker 1:do we start, if not the?
Speaker 5:beginning, am I right?
Speaker 3:Monsters, monsters.
Speaker 2:Who's starting this? Yeah, thanks, jason, I think that's me.
Speaker 4:At least I hope so. It's Jayden.
Speaker 3:Yes. Yes, I will be starting this off. Man, don't worry, there's a buffer. So this, this story, is a strange one, and the reason I say it's strange is the like the way it starts and the way it's found. It depends on what like what year you're in, I guess. So if you were, if you found this in 2018, pretty like beginning of the year, january, february, march, all the way up until July you probably would have found yeah.
Speaker 3:The YouTube Now the Twitter is is something that was formed in July of 2018. A lot of the tweets that you're going to see on the Twitter do correspond with different, different videos that you're going to watch as you go through the whole series. It's the timeline is kind of fucked up and Daisy so Daisy is the main character in the series and she kind of goes over why it's fucked up this, that and the other long story short. She never really grew up with electronics, so it's she's not used to a delete key. That's the short way of putting it. So you're going to see a lot of typos in these tweets. You're going to see a lot of just, it doesn't look normal by any means or by any stretch of the imagination, and that's just the words.
Speaker 2:Are you saying she learned to type on something else?
Speaker 3:on Twitter is the banner. She learned to type on something else. I'm going to go ahead and let some someone else dive. All of that information comes out in one of the videos. Yeah, okay, there we go.
Speaker 5:Yeah, she learned to type on a Mario. Yes, exactly.
Speaker 3:Now I'm just thinking about how you do that.
Speaker 2:Just that, that that I was just thinking about trying to say that thing at the beginning, as Mario 64, where you're like stretching his nose and like oh yeah, are you stretching them?
Speaker 3:Sure, mario letters. So the Twitter Twitter is going to have a lot of ancillary information. You're going to be referencing the Twitter a lot when it comes to things that you you hear in the videos and you want some clarification, for it's going to elucidate some different topics, some side characters. It's going to give you some explanations about who is involved in this whole story. It's all very, very ancillary. There is some important stuff there, so definitely pay attention, but you guys cannot just blow by a soundbite to fucking save your lives. Please continue. God damn, you're so subtle, though.
Speaker 4:It really was.
Speaker 5:Well, now I have to leave it in for sure.
Speaker 2:I was just testing to make sure my mic was recording in audacity.
Speaker 3:You know who you're talking to my guy.
Speaker 4:You know your children.
Speaker 3:We cannot.
Speaker 2:I had it under control until I saw Mike and Doug.
Speaker 1:Fuck.
Speaker 3:Everybody's broken.
Speaker 4:I wasn't even like listening to Jason. I was literally like reading through some tweets from the Daisy Brown Twitter and I just and just I, fucking my brain is so fucking it's I'm a 12 year old. I immediately had to laugh.
Speaker 3:Oh my God, I'm doing great. I do, please do. I do want to bring to your attention a video by the name of chocolate rain by Tays on.
Speaker 1:He moves away from the mouth.
Speaker 3:He's a wave, but I was intentionally making sure my mic was picking things up. You know what? Then don't listen to me.
Speaker 2:I don't know what I'm talking about. Chocolate rained all over the mic.
Speaker 3:Yeah, go ahead. We're very clearly paused. Holy shit, okay, the tweets, the tweets, the tweets, the tweets. Do we always owe?
Speaker 3:While we, while, while we while while Robert Zaubert, robert, robert, so the the the Twitter. You're going to want to look at the Twitter as you're watching through these videos. However, a lot of people did find this whole story just by finding the Twitter and the thing that's weird about it yes, there's spelling, but the banner picture is literally just it's. There's no face, but it's this woman holding like a fucked up potato baby thing, like it's. It's like this gray I don't even I don't know what it is, and that thing is the subject of this whole fucking series called Daisy Brown. This thing is, we find out. This thing's name is Alan and it's we find out very quickly, based on the first fucking video that we get from Daisy Brown, but I have no, no information on the first couple of videos.
Speaker 2:Yeah, sure. What do you have for us? Pretend you didn't know this Twitter existed and what, what?
Speaker 5:hang on, there's a what I can explain Mike just pulled up.
Speaker 3:Mike is image Google searching cum socks.
Speaker 5:Yes, you are. Do you remember the picture? It's like a living cum sock. That's so amazing. That's what Alan looks like. I see if I can find the fucking picture.
Speaker 2:All the other come. Looks like the cum sock kids. The cum sock kids. Yeah that's fair.
Speaker 5:You don't want to.
Speaker 3:You don't want to. We might have to now that, honestly, I'm mad that that was worth it. Yeah, alan looks just like the cum sock kids. Okay, just a little gray.
Speaker 2:I got to Google it cum sock kids.
Speaker 3:Please, yeah, please. So we were all the same page here, that's not an accurate no, but it's not inaccurate.
Speaker 5:That's the first thing I thought.
Speaker 2:It's Alan's parents.
Speaker 5:Okay, so pretend you haven't seen a cum sock kid before and pretend you haven't seen this Twitter before what you're going to be greeted with.
Speaker 2:What you're going to be greeted with is a video called how I feed Alan, and this is the first video that's on the Daisy Brown YouTube channel, and it is a video of basically what Jason has described. It's a woman sitting on the floor and she's got a lumpy potato like gray colored thing in her lap and it is goblin.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's like a quadriplegic goblin, I sat with myself.
Speaker 2:I sat with myself while I was making these notes and really tried to come up with a way to describe Alan that didn't include talking about fetal alcohol syndrome.
Speaker 1:But that's.
Speaker 2:He's got these ginormous eyeballs and he's got teeth that are very big, but it's not a complete set of teeth, and he's got these boils that are growing out of him. He's disgusting looking. He's repulsive, but yeah, she does mention that he's blind.
Speaker 2:So, anyway, it's this baby thing called Alan laying on her lap and she goes over a couple of things about him. He's blind and she feeds him, and in the video she actually shows you what she feeds him. But we've learned that Alan doesn't digest anything other than just sugar, so she gives him these sugar tablets.
Speaker 1:What a life.
Speaker 2:And she has to force them down his throat. They're like these little yellow balls, and she proceeds to feed them to him and she's digging her hands in his mouth. And he's making these noises that are also really unsettling.
Speaker 3:And they're like it's all super. It's like if your whole mouth was just a wet vocal cord.
Speaker 2:It's squishy. It's basically probably what I would imagine a cum sock kid sounds like. It's gross Really. That's pretty much the entirety of the video. The description reads Hi everybody, this is Daisy Brown.
Speaker 2:This is my first video on YouTube. I'm showing you guys how I feed Alan, the monster that lives in my house. He was under the weather when we filmed this and that's why he wasn't very loud. His mouth was very dry. I hope you all enjoyed. Let me know what you want to know or see from me or us. I also have a Twitter. Thank you, have a great day. Please be nice. In the comments I don't want to hear anything mean about Alan. Like I said, he's been sick for a while. I hope you all learned some valuable information about monsters.
Speaker 2:So the second video doesn't include anything about Alan. This video is just called At the Zoo and it is a video of an enclosure inside of a zoo, like an indoor enclosure, and most of the video is just these two lemurs cuddling and at first like first watching this. There's really nothing else that you get from this. It's literally just this video. But if you turn the captions on we this starts a long string of like a subplot that develops in the captions in the videos, and so there's only three in this video, but those are the silence of loneliness, the silence of longing, the silence of desire and contemplation. And these are just kind of popping up. They don't accompany any like voice or anything, they're just in the captions.
Speaker 2:And so we kind of find out more about Daisy as this goes on, and so if you come back to this video and think about it, you can kind of gather like that this is kind of a metaphor for how Daisy's feeling. So we move on to the third video, which is Alan's, back this time. So Daisy wants to talk about dad, science, alan and the basement. So as far as the YouTube videos go, this is the first time that she brings up her dad. But the video starts with Alan laying on her lap, like the first one, and I wrote down in my notes he's got some weird teats, because you can see. You can see like these weird little foil things that are like on his chest and it's really it's even worse.
Speaker 2:Yeah, semi clear. They look like they're going to pop.
Speaker 3:Semi clear yellow.
Speaker 2:But apparently it didn't occur to Daisy that the monsters weren't common and that it would be a surprise to people to see Alan, and she also talks about. Somebody suggested to start feeding Alan sugar water to make sure that he's hydrated. But throughout the course of this video we also learned that her dad invented Alan and apparently her dad works with genetics and he has a lab, but she's never seen it and she's never been to it so or and she doesn't know where it is. She claims that Alan started out smaller and gooier and that she tried to find her dad's notes on Alan and the attic of the house, but she couldn't find them and the basement of the house has also been sealed off due to what her dad said was black mold since she was a kid. And she kind of like starts to try to talk more about her dad, but she just says that like people asked about her dad, and she says he's not here and abruptly ends the video, like she just cuts the video off Because she's obviously getting upset.
Speaker 2:There are more hidden captions in this video. Feelings welling up again, anxiety all these thoughts and feelings all over again, blood pumping faster. So this is kind of the first.
Speaker 3:You said so, just just to reiterate. These are all these like little side pieces, these are all right, yeah, nobody's talking when these are happening.
Speaker 2:These are kind of like just shoved in between lines of dialogue in most of the videos. Sometimes and we'll find that more as we go on Like sometimes these are kind of like a narrative that's narrating what's going on, and they're just like random thoughts. Sometimes they seem to be attributed to what Daisy's feeling or thinking, and sometimes it also seems like they can be connected to maybe what Alan is thinking or maybe what Daisy thinks Alan is thinking. That's unclear, but we'll get more of that later on the next.
Speaker 4:Real quick and correct me if I'm wrong. There is a part in that last video when she's talking about the black mold and she brings up something particular that the black mold could cause.
Speaker 2:Oh my God, I don't remember what exactly, she says she says like it can hurt your lungs or something, I don't know.
Speaker 4:So for all of our fans who listen to this because they actually like the content, and not just us being idiots.
Speaker 3:All two of you. Maybe, that's generous.
Speaker 4:She casually and I'm going to brush past this basically, but she casually mentions that being around black mold can cause lynx disease. L-y-n-k-s.
Speaker 3:Oh, I didn't catch that in this video.
Speaker 4:I'm not even one of my later videos, but I'm it could have been a different video, I just remember she was talking about black mold and lynx disease.
Speaker 2:Maybe it is in this one. I didn't write it down.
Speaker 3:Well, if that's the case, if that's the case, maybe the editor will make this. One of us is wrong.
Speaker 1:We'll find out which.
Speaker 2:So, anyway the second or the next video after this is my garden. What should I use to fill the empty space? She explains in this video that she doesn't go outside during the day and that she needs to whisper, which is like does that mean she's going to get caught? I don't know. But Alan's with her outside and he's just like fucking chilling in the chair. He's wrapped up in a blanket and he's got his sugar water and he's like yeah, man, it's a whole vibe for sure it's a fighting dog.
Speaker 2:But she like starts talking about her cactuses and she has a bamboo plant as well, and then she goes over like some more succulents that she's growing and really that's basically just what this video is. The only notable thing about this video, as far as I can tell, is this is the first time that there's like a kind of like a game with the viewers in the description.
Speaker 2:So she asks everybody in the description she asks everybody to just comment and say what the name of their favorite plant is, with no explanation, because she thinks it'll be funny to people who don't read the description. So the next video is a little bit longer and it's called Makeup Swatches with Alan the Monster, my first note under this one is god damn Alan's fucking ugly, but it's the
Speaker 2:same format, with Alan laying in Daisy's lap and well, actually he's laying on a chair, but it's kind of the same framing and she's like, hey, let's fucking put makeup on this monster. So she starts with some bright red lipstick. She explains that she found some of the makeup in the attic Pay attention to that. And then she also mentions that she got some of the drugstore. But apparently this is like her first time ever playing with makeup and most of this video really do just be her like trying out different shades of like different makeups that she's pulling out and like sticking them on Alan and eventually he falls asleep. And she does note that he falls asleep with his eyes open, but I thought he was dead for a little bit, like I was very excited, dude, there are so many moments in this series where I'm like Alan's fucking dead, for sure, he's just dead.
Speaker 2:There's another description game to this one. This time you're supposed to say your favorite drink, and then this is also one that has some captions on it. So they're kind of divided into two parts and this is what I was talking about where some of the captions seem like they're attributed to Daisy and some of them seem like they're attributed to Alan. So, while Alan is kind of like moaning and making his noises, there's captions. That there's. I don't like the sentence of Alan moaning.
Speaker 2:He's groaning, we'll use groaning instead, but the description, the captions do say groaning and moaning, more moaning, tired groans, angry groans, and then while and then Daisy's Are trying to impress silent embarrassment, feelings of awkward glee and pride.
Speaker 2:Embarrassment trying to impress strangers, childish wonder. So, speaking of the attic, the next video is called searching the attic. So this is basically Daisy wandering up into her attic and she's got a candle with her and she's like just looking around at all the shit that's up there. There's a bunch of clothes, there's some books, apparently. There's some shelves that are just like completely packed with shit. That's mostly papers. She finds a tub of hair at one point, which is really weird. She basically mentions that there's like a bunch of pretty normal things that are just boxed up with descriptions, like there's wedding photos, some old family photos from before 1994. And then wrapping paper, which she notes is weird because she's never had a birthday party before.
Speaker 5:Yeah, so kind of sad, but I guess.
Speaker 2:So basically the whole time weird, not because she's like I didn't know all this shit was up here, like this is all normal stuff, but I've never seen it before. It's been up here this whole time and I don't understand.
Speaker 5:Sorry. What are you doing? What are you doing why?
Speaker 3:are you?
Speaker 5:drawing attention to it.
Speaker 3:Because I'm curious.
Speaker 5:What are you doing? It doesn't matter, did you spill or something?
Speaker 2:What's happening right now?
Speaker 5:You lying to me right now.
Speaker 3:No Is it, don't worry about it.
Speaker 2:That's not toasty Good.
Speaker 4:It is.
Speaker 2:Good.
Speaker 4:What a bro. Good guy Jason. Much warmer than mine the description contains this Hi guys.
Speaker 2:This was not fun to film, but this is the attic. There's a lot more that isn't even shown here. Comment and let me know if you see anything that might look like my dad's notes. Thanks guys. Bye, but the comments are turned off, so that's helpful.
Speaker 2:There are also some hidden captions to this video and they all show up at the end when Daisy decides to stop looking around and go downstairs. They say anxiety, something primal, some ingrained fear of the unknown, heart beating faster, skin crawling. So we can kind of see like there's a pattern developing with these captions and they're mostly like internal dialogue or what Daisy's feeling at the time. So we get another zoo video. This one is more animals cuddling. This time it's pteromans. They're like these weird little fucking monkey things with mustaches.
Speaker 5:They are cute. I like them, they're cute.
Speaker 2:There's literally the entire video. There are captions I'll go over, but it's just footage of these pteromans and the description says hi guys, things have been strafe stressful lately and I haven't been very active on YouTube or Twitter because I'm trying to help Alan recover from his mouth jaw injury. He'll hopefully be well enough to be in the video next week. Here's a video I took of the zoo. I love you. So the captions are the emperor, pteromans, tamarins, tamarins.
Speaker 2:Yeah, the new father struggles to hold his twins, struggles to hide them. Reaching out for help is pointless. No one will be able to understand. But I can't do this on my own. He screams into emptiness. I need to hide them. He says they're not ready, they don't know enough. I am a poor teacher. She doesn't know enough. The huge world will consume her. Cling to my back, child Hush now Don't worry. This is the whole world. This is it. Everything outside of this place is dangerous and cruel. The world outside of this place is loud pain. Cling to me. Cling to me or face the loud, cruel, hungry world.
Speaker 5:I don't think the monkey was thinking all that. I think the monkey was more thinking where's the banana?
Speaker 4:And any of you guys just wear a banana.
Speaker 5:You're really selling this monkey. Right now, it's like that. No, this monkey is thinking that Gif of the Gorilla, the video where it's we're getting started Mount wife. Life good Wife, fight back.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's not that complicated Throw wife Now sad when are you gonna say something, Jason?
Speaker 3:Cool Suitcase search. I just cracked the video.
Speaker 2:So this is a video where Daisy apparently decided to go back up into the attic and grab a suitcase and open it up and pull shit out of it. So she goes over what she finds on the suitcase. What's in the suitcase is a hundred years of solitude with a bookmark. It's a book called A Hundred Years of Solitude with a bookmark in page 65.
Speaker 3:Thank you, thank you.
Speaker 5:She found the idea of a hundred years of solitude, the idea of a hundred years of solitude. And you're just the concept of.
Speaker 2:She's back now, though A hundred years of solitude.
Speaker 1:It's like a fucking hyperbolic time chamber.
Speaker 5:Cool yeah. So she found the hyperbolic time chamber. So she finds a hyperbolic time chamber. She finds the splitters.
Speaker 2:She finds a mood ring. There's a box with a keyhole in it and she said she couldn't find the key, but she just fucking pried the shit open and she was able to get inside of it. So inside.
Speaker 2:So she did find the key yeah inside of this box there was a bag of shiny rocks, a stamp of a girl watering flowers, a bin of tea that she took the tea out of, a pen that says hooray for library kids. She says she doesn't recognize any of this stuff and then she continues to pull shit out. There's earrings and necklace, pink nail polish that's all dried up, a tiny music box that plays music from Alice in Wonderland, and she says she recognizes it because she used to watch that movie when she was a kid. There are captions like as she's starting to get closer to the end of these that say feeling like an idiot, did you really just forget the note or did you want to have it all to yourself? Stupid or selfish?
Speaker 2:So at this point she remembers that there was a note inside the box and she stands up to go get it and she brings it back and the note says when I stand in the mirror and look at both of us, I know that God is real. And she finds a match, a used match. And then she finds some carbon paper. And when she finds the carbon paper she starts to have like this meltdown. And she mentions that her dad used to buy her this type of carbon paper for her typewriter that she used to type on as a kid. And when she stops she starts crying and there's more captions that say a tidal wave of emotions come crashing back, struggling to push it down. Keep going, just move on.
Speaker 2:So after this happens and she explains the typewriter paper, if she just kind of like, abruptly ends the video again the same way that she did when she was talking about her dad. So the last video I'll cover is Monster tries different sugar sources for the first time and Alan's back in this one and she's decided yeah, the monster that her dad created, he created a monster, but nobody wants to see Marshall. No more Alan. They want Alan. He's this thing.
Speaker 4:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Geez.
Speaker 1:I'm a liver.
Speaker 2:Anyway, she's going to feed Alan different sources of sugar that people have recommended that she try to feed him. So she's going to give him honey, granulated sugar, sugar, water, pills like his original pills. And she starts trying to give him these things, and so she starts with the pills. And this is the first time we get what seems to be captions about what Alan is thinking or is saying. But the captions say this foolish child frivolous in vain.
Speaker 2:This world was built for me, not her, and I was built for this world. Bitch, entitled bitch. So very clearly Alan is not about the pills and he won't swallow them, and she says as much. So she gives up on the pills and so she tries to give him honey, and Alan is still on his fucking like high horse here and he's like stupid, ignorant. You are the blind one, this stupid bitch. So Alan clearly doesn't like the honey either and he really hates the granulated sugar, because that's when we got the this stupid bitch part. But then when she switches to the sugar water and she gives him the sugar water, he starts sucking that shit down and the caption we get just says damn, and that's it.
Speaker 3:Damn.
Speaker 2:She ends the video by noting that she's going to like keep feeding Alan the sugar water, but she's not sure how it's going to change Alan because this isn't what she's been doing in the past and she's not sure if it's going to help him grow. And that is the end.
Speaker 3:Well, if I know anything about bugs, well, that's the end of my section.
Speaker 2:I'm sorry.
Speaker 1:That was supposed to be threatening it's the end of my section though.
Speaker 4:Hey, that's the end of the episode.
Speaker 2:You have more videos though.
Speaker 5:Hey, hey, I do have more videos. I have a couple more videos. We're going to start it off with everyone's favorite type of video. A 14 and a half minute long video called full face Alan makeup look and let me tell you who is a doozy. Gorgeous is a word you can use. Personally I would not, okay.
Speaker 1:well, you can do whatever you want.
Speaker 5:You ever hear the term putting makeup on a pig? No, oh, that's what she's doing to Alan right now.
Speaker 3:Okay, so it would help if I knew what that meant.
Speaker 5:Anyway. So this is a makeup tutorial where she is answering these questions that a bunch of people have asked her. While she's doing Alan's makeup, she answers questions about things like what is links disease? That's like the first one to come up.
Speaker 3:People are like hey what is links disease she's like have you ever seen an edited bear? Have you no?
Speaker 1:Yeah, should we talk about a little bit now.
Speaker 3:We might as well discuss.
Speaker 4:I have it at the end of the outline.
Speaker 5:But so she's like. They're like what's links disease? She's like I wish I knew she's my.
Speaker 2:I've heard the word she's like. I don't know.
Speaker 5:My dad has told me about it. She's like my dad told me never to go into the basement because that's where the black mold be, and black mold gives you links, disease, and that's bad. It'll kill you, it'll melt your insides, so don't go down there. And she's like and I never will go down there. So she mentions that her dad told her about it and when she brings up her dad she gets like choked up about it, like she stops like talking for a minute and like cuts away. You get another question why do you misspell?
Speaker 1:And it's cause she's used to typing on a typewriter.
Speaker 5:We've been silly, yep, yep, yep. Come on now, silly, she gets another question Is Alan your brother? No, silly, he's a monster. Don't be silly. Why would you think he's the brother?
Speaker 3:She's like I like the next question.
Speaker 5:People are like is he a? Is he like your brother? Is he a pet? She's like, he's none of those things he's, he's a monster. He's Alan Like. I don't see him as a pet or brother, he's just, he's just Alan. You know what I mean. And the next one why no? Show face. Why no show face?
Speaker 4:Why no show face? Why no show face?
Speaker 1:And she's like show Bob's Show Bob. Why no Bob or Vagin? I love her reason.
Speaker 2:She's like why no show Bob or Vagin?
Speaker 5:Yeah, she's like why the fuck you? Yeah, she's like why should I?
Speaker 3:I don't care enough to so this is.
Speaker 5:this is Alan's channel, Not mine. This is for Alan and my plants and not my face. So you get what you get. Fuck on all the way off there. If you find a channel called Daisy's face.
Speaker 3:you'll know what you're, but this is Daisy's brown.
Speaker 5:Go look up the interview. I don't know this is Daisy's brown this is all the waste down, my friend. There's another question that she gets asked. It's can Alan do harm? I just think of this little thing with like a gun, like a clock, Give me your money.
Speaker 1:Put that knife away, Alan.
Speaker 5:He's got a knife. And she's just like no fucking. Look at him, he's got no arms or legs. No, he doesn't do harm. Look at him Like he can't do harm.
Speaker 4:He's a puppet. He's a puppet.
Speaker 5:So we do get some more close captions in this as well.
Speaker 2:No, he's not a puppet. She doesn't have to keep her hand behind him, that's true, she just chooses no, no, no, no.
Speaker 3:They go over that. There's a whole thing about that. Oh, we'll get to it. We'll get to it. So super meta and I know Matt you said you didn't see anything.
Speaker 4:No, I watched my part. I haven't watched anything past my screen.
Speaker 2:Oh God.
Speaker 4:Well, it doesn't matter, because that's not my part.
Speaker 3:He kept, kept, kept up with the parts.
Speaker 4:My part is fucked. Yeah, you're anyway, no spoilers, yeah.
Speaker 3:Guys, come back next week please. You'll see why.
Speaker 5:So there are some hidden captions I would say just about all these. So expect that from just going forward, these hidden captions that say I can't stop thinking about our future. Our future, all he can think about is nature. While I'm in snaring in nature, will the seeds I sow, I now so, grow into the fruitful plant of my dreams? Will it be a boy or a girl? Will future generations remember it? Will they keep up the legacy, legacy right?
Speaker 4:I don't care about tomorrow.
Speaker 5:The John Wayne legacy yeah. I don't care about tomorrow, Today, tonight I'm safe and I'm happy. We'll figure out future in the future. For tonight, just hold me and know that we're okay. I can't wait to meet you.
Speaker 3:My legs are wet. Is that a thing, or is that just a thing?
Speaker 5:you're saying to us this is how it ends. It says my legs are wet.
Speaker 4:Okay, that actually will make sense later it will.
Speaker 3:I just thought you were telling us, giving us an update with your lower half, the next video my legs are wet.
Speaker 5:My legs are wet, oh my God. This thing can we just talk. It's Kermit right, it has.
Speaker 3:Kermit voice.
Speaker 5:Oh no, my legs are wet that would make the captions earlier.
Speaker 2:The next one is called Intitle bitch.
Speaker 1:You little intitle bitch Damn, oh damn.
Speaker 4:It's me, kermi. Damn it, my legs are wet this world is built for me.
Speaker 5:The next video is. The next video is called Plant update Bitch.
Speaker 3:Sorry, you're going to have to keep going while we do this.
Speaker 1:We're not stopping this. It's called.
Speaker 5:You little bitch, you're not for anybody. Plant update Her plants be dying.
Speaker 1:That's the update God damn it.
Speaker 5:It's three minutes of her being like. Why is she's dying? What am I going to do?
Speaker 3:I'm going to put water in there? Probably not, but we do a lot of them are cactuses, to be fair, a lot of them look like cactuses.
Speaker 2:This is something you'd see if you wanted to know.
Speaker 4:Cactuses don't need as much water but the bamboo does, so she's on top of they don't you have to water a cactus like one special month.
Speaker 2:It takes special talent to fuck it up.
Speaker 1:You rigged her bitch. Yeah, oh, no, my cactus.
Speaker 5:So we do get a bunch of closed captions in this one as well. They this is throughout the entire thing, but basically it starts off saying no, no, no, no. This can't be right, it's losing.
Speaker 1:You okay.
Speaker 5:Finally, it's not just me, seriously. And then you get not. Now Let me work. But all the numbers were right. Oh my God, I can't fail this again. I can't make another gross monstrosity. I can't keep screwing this up. Can't you do anything, right? No, go to your room. Can't you see dad's working? Hey, buddy, go to your room. I was sure this one would work. Why do they keep turning out to be disastrous? God, it's hard as beating but looks like a miscarriage.
Speaker 4:It does kind of look like a miscarriage.
Speaker 5:Jesus, that's one way to put it. And then you just hear it and then he just goes calm down. I can figure something out. I can figure something out. It's hard as beating. That's a small victory. I can figure something out. Maybe I can save this. I'm sure I can fix this. I have to. Can you do, kermit voice?
Speaker 4:for this one.
Speaker 5:What's the next line Right here?
Speaker 4:Daisy, if you interrupt me one more time, I'll put your.
Speaker 1:I'll pull your goddamn hair out. There we go.
Speaker 5:Thank you. So that's kind of mean. Who's pulling Daisy's hair out? That's a pretty nice process. This sounds, and I'm just spitballing here, but the fact that it says, no, go to your room, can't you see dad's working Something? This is dad making Alan Like over a long period of time make sense.
Speaker 2:You know what?
Speaker 5:I mean Sorry, why can't I make it work? He's amongst Bunsen burners and such like. Work, damn it work, he's. He's fucking what's his name's dad from invaders him oh, did dad yeah.
Speaker 3:So Kelly's never seen that and. I know Fuck it. We got baked as fuck and watched invaders him and she was obsessed. It's so much fun to watch someone who has never seen invaders it before watching vaders in for the first time.
Speaker 5:I never liked how gross it was.
Speaker 3:It's very gross and if you don't know that going in, you know it's you know it's better than invaders them right and Johnny the homicidal maniac, oh my, but that's also a different Is not for children's so it's better.
Speaker 4:It's so much better. The next video.
Speaker 5:We'll talk. Johnny is entitled. Alan is growing.
Speaker 4:Yeah, he is.
Speaker 5:He's growing. He's a real boy, I'm a real boy. So in here we find some weird root like hairs growing out of Alan.
Speaker 3:Oh, these the blue fucker along with some blue bumpies the blue fucker.
Speaker 4:There's some blue fuckies yeah.
Speaker 5:And then you get the closed captions again. This is a long one. So here we fucking go. Oh, don't wake him up, don't wake him up, don't wake him up, don't wake him up. I'm getting better at this camera stuff. I hope they like my nails in this video.
Speaker 5:Stomach drops, heart racing, no, no, no, no. What is that? Is that part of his body? Does this mean he can grow? Will he keep growing? I can't do this. I can't do this. Can it be cut off? If I cut it off, we'll just grow back. No, I can't cut it. What would dad say? No, it's fine. This is nothing to worry about. It's just a couple of roots, but there are other bumps on him. Will they sprout too? Why am I so nervous? It's just a few weird growths. It's just a few sprouts. It's a good thing if Alan is growing. Dad wanted this. You can't ruin it. The people out there also want to grow and be healthy. Oh God, please give me the strength to handle this. God, please Let this be nothing to worry about. God, please watch over us this is a blessing.
Speaker 1:It's fine.
Speaker 5:It's fine. Think about something else. This is all gonna be fine. Don't ruin this. Okay, what? What do I do? What would dad do? Did dad leave me anything that that could let me know? No, the notes. Oh no, I need to find the notes. Heart racing the nose. So it definitely seems like she's freaking the fuck out about Alan getting some getting his real boy some tubers Getting his a real boy in.
Speaker 5:Yes, he's going through pubertus and she is not a fan. The next video. It's called painting Alan's nails. This is eight minutes of fun painting nails. So it's time for some nail painting. Daisy paints a tracing of her own hand for Alan, because Alan doesn't have hands, so she's like this will represent his hand. Here's a painting of a drug tracing on my hand. We're just gonna paint these nails.
Speaker 5:So while she's painting these nails, she starts talking about the question box that she has. Now she's a little surprised because she heard on Twitter that a lot of people didn't have these growing up. Basically, what this question box is it is a Box that if she had a question for her dad, she would write it on paper and put it in the box. If dad was comfortable answering the question, he would. If not, he would burn the paper. Also, we get these weird captions that pop up on the screen saying don't ask me where my dad is. I don't want to get sad. She also then mentions that she's still looking for her dad's notes on Alan. Meanwhile, she's just like oh, let's put a little purple on these nails. Let's mix in some red here. Oh looks fabulous, fabulous.
Speaker 3:Alan, you're looking hot. She went hard on explaining how like she did just keep in mind this is not gonna show up normally on this thing. Skin like yep, but super fucked up.
Speaker 5:Yeah, so we figure out about that weird box. So it's safe to say she didn't have the most normal Up bringing. You could say no fuck, now the closed captioning here again one shocker. I know you get dad the shocker. Dad, dad, dad. Why are you this late, shocker?
Speaker 3:Nope, nope, keep going, mike, Keep talking. I think this is this one.
Speaker 5:I do my best to kind of mix between dialogues. Why'd you say that?
Speaker 1:I'm gonna do my best.
Speaker 5:I'm gonna do my best to mix between a couple different voices on this one, because I think this argument between her and her father. So we go dad dad, why are you up this late? I'm sorry, I could sleep, but orders.
Speaker 1:You don't need to apologize. Oh, you know how to do, don't be dad you don't need to apologize.
Speaker 5:night is when we're safest, daisy, look up, you see the stars. You see the stars.
Speaker 1:I see Orion.
Speaker 5:The constellations. Are God watching us, daisy? That's why, at night, all the dangerous people go away.
Speaker 1:Other people in the world who aren't dangerous.
Speaker 5:Some. Some people are good and kind and smart, but most of them are bad. It's safer to stay away in case.
Speaker 1:Like the people.
Speaker 5:Pizarro found yes, just like that. All right, so the girls Changed almost every time you get the idea Pizarro had to protect his people from the dangerous ones.
Speaker 1:Tell me more about the dangerous people.
Speaker 5:No, you're too young to hear about them but I'm older than Harry Potter, dad. The answer is no.
Speaker 1:But what if a person comes here? How will I know if they're dangerous? No one is coming here, but what if they do? What if I find person at night? Look into their eyes. You'll know if they're good. How will I know?
Speaker 5:You're asking a lot of questions, daisy. You're starting to sound rude.
Speaker 1:I'm not trying to be rude, I'm sorry. What?
Speaker 5:what does God tell us about being curious?
Speaker 1:curiosity killed the cat. I'm sorry, dad.
Speaker 2:Now Daisy one of the ten commandments.
Speaker 5:I won't be the one making the decisions of.
Speaker 4:Now.
Speaker 5:Daisy, I love you, but I won't be the one making the decision of if you're worthy of God's forgiveness.
Speaker 1:I know, I'm sorry If you know then don't ask. But it books. I know that people find husbands and friends outside. That means maybe I could find good people out there.
Speaker 5:Well, since you know so much about the world, then just go ahead and find good people.
Speaker 1:Dad, I know I don't want to leave. That's my smart girl.
Speaker 3:Who's weird, can I address? Okay, I'm sorry.
Speaker 1:I need to address the discord comments.
Speaker 3:I know that Daisy might sound like she's an old hillbilly, but I I assure you that is just Mike. That sounds like an old hillbilly.
Speaker 5:I'm so sorry, jerny, she's actually definitely British very, very British yeah well, I don't do British accents. No, this is America.
Speaker 3:Just like I don't.
Speaker 5:British accents when extinct in 1776.
Speaker 4:Mike, I can't have you ever say those that phrase, ever again. This is America. Yeah, we should avoid that.
Speaker 3:Oh yeah, let's. I would not like to be known as an American, yeah so the next episode I Say episode, their videos are.
Speaker 5:The next video is titled Alan pulled out.
Speaker 1:Hey, look the cat that I can told her they
Speaker 5:did, they did that he warned a bitch. This just a video of Alan.
Speaker 1:You bitch.
Speaker 5:Pull your god. Yeah, yeah. This is literally just a video when Alan yanks the fuck out of a load of days, is here like I'm talking. She's like bald now. There's blood everywhere. She mentions on Twitter a bunch that her scalp is torn up. It's healing but it's still fucked up. But in this you do hear a very small, you do see a very small closed caption. It just says come back to me, I can't do this alone. Weird, very. This next one is called I made dinner hashbrowns.
Speaker 5:Seven minutes of making hash browns. She's like I keep the skin on my potatoes because that's where you get all the.
Speaker 2:I started this video with the full intention of watching the entire thing, and paying attention to it and I even set it on to X speed and it like a minute into it I was like I'm not paying attention to this anymore. I had some down.
Speaker 5:Well, I'm summing it up for you.
Speaker 2:You don't have to worry about it.
Speaker 5:It is literally just her making hash browns, yep so, but there's a bunch in the closed captions.
Speaker 3:Here this one, I don't know who it's supposed to be, so I'm gonna give it just a regular my favorite part of this is that Mike had every opportunity in the book to make this a like a dialogue between two people that are talking, and he just decided to do the whole thing himself.
Speaker 5:Yeah, yeah anyway, let's go ahead with the closed caption here, shall we?
Speaker 3:Yeah, by yourself. Oh god, I'm dying.
Speaker 1:I'm dying. It took too much blood. I'm gonna die here.
Speaker 5:I don't even know I can't do it. I can't keep Kermit going, so I'm just gonna talk it out.
Speaker 3:I also would like to just put into the ether that if it were Kermit saying these things, a lot of like the, the very heavy, the very like meaningful things put into this Might get erased just a little bit. Mm-hmm, just anyway, we like to make fun and everything like that, but I will say, just in the vein of like what this is.
Speaker 2:The story behind this is actually very listen to this. We're making a huge joke out of it very fuck yeah, we use humor.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yes, I just I just want to say that I just want to make sure we're all the same page in that vein. We are. I don't want to make I want, I don't want to like we're making fun of this because I speak for yourself. No way shape or form. Are we doing that Okay?
Speaker 5:I guess I will so close caption time, I'm gonna start it over. I'm just gonna talk it out ready. Oh god, I'm dying, it's too much blood. I'm gonna die here. No, you're not gonna die. Stop talking like that nearby crying when, when, when is that good job? Did it survive? Yes, it lived, I did it, it survived and it's just beautiful. Oh dear god and Jesus, please don't let me die now. Haha, it's alive, it's beautiful. Oh no, I'm losing so much blood.
Speaker 5:Dying is an art, like everything else. I do it exceptionally well. Oh Honey, please stop shaking me. That won't make me survive. Oh god, please watch over this newborn. Oh Jesus, please Don't let it think I left or I didn't care. Let it grow up big and strong. Let it do something great. I can't believe it. I finally give birth and I'll never get to see this child grow. I'll never teach it anything. I'll never be able to tell it I love it, but, but life will go on without me. It is sweet to know that stocks will stand when we, with Daisy's, lie that commerce will continue and trades a briskly, briskly fly. And who wrote that? I guess it doesn't matter much now. Goodbye, darling, goodbye world. Please wake up. I can't do this without you.
Speaker 3:It sounded like you were gonna go into a you choose to approach me.
Speaker 2:I'm most fucked up part of the whole fucking series.
Speaker 3:It really is, ha ha this.
Speaker 5:Daisy's. I don't know what to make of this. Can we talk about she was?
Speaker 3:pushing her out of her hooter. Can we talk about the dad as well?
Speaker 1:Yeah, daisy's mom doesn't exist yeah.
Speaker 3:Daisy does exist. Yeah, which is a shitty way of thinking about it, but it's also the truth and but it's a.
Speaker 4:It's a pivotal part on why things are happening, which I don't think we're far enough in to explain, yet Fuck no yeah, but we'll get there, we will. Daisy came out. Who ha, who died?
Speaker 5:Just the, just the, just the hoo-ha, the hoo-ha anyway, next video I have is called the calm video. Okay, bye. So Daisy is now outside, you pick whatever. Daisy's outside now, but she's got to be super quiet because we don't want people knowing that we're outside. Daisy typically goes out at night when people aren't out, she she's going around. Hey look, there's her favorite wheelbarrow, it's right there. She finds a skater husk and she brings it in this is so fucking creepy.
Speaker 5:We get this, she gets it is. She gets very like existential and she starts talking about how everything around her is dead.
Speaker 2:Well, it's like this bag is like trying to like get the skater.
Speaker 1:She's like, oh, it's gonna be alright.
Speaker 5:Yeah she's. I hope it's gonna be, alright, even though she knows it's a husk, which is odd. But Then she shows us all over wind chimes that her dad put up, and he's put all these up over by the windows and what not, and this is straight up just like an old-school security measure. Am I wrong in thinking that they put it by all the windows so if anyone comes in they?
Speaker 3:get here right. That's like, I'm not wrong, that's what I got. That's what I got from this too. The paranoid me definitely identified there.
Speaker 5:It reminded me of fucking dear David when he put the yes, the solo cups out in front of the door.
Speaker 3:Oh, my god, I'm so happy you mentioned that. Can I just say I confused this with your, david a lot of people put them together.
Speaker 5:I read an article about it. I read an article about it.
Speaker 3:They were like yeah, by the creator, adam Alice, blah, blah blah. And like I was right there, I'm like I'm. He didn't make Daisy Brown. Oh, why are they saying he did? And I like I had this whole inner monologue. I'm like what the this article is fucking wrong. It's wrong. I was just being an idiot anyway.
Speaker 5:So, hey, we found some other fun stuff in the attic here. We found a couple of books. We found, like some Edgar Allen pose and whatnot. Found this like a painting, a picture of a painting. We found a photo which is a little too dark to see much of. We also found a drawing that Daisy did when she was younger. It's like a lady with red hair. I'm gonna make the assumption this is probably mom. Don't know how accurate that is now, she wouldn't know. Maybe not who knows, but there's a weird symbol.
Speaker 4:Let's do a picture.
Speaker 5:I forgot to look up what the symbol meant, but there's like a what sort of looking for like an alchemy symbol.
Speaker 2:Oh, my god yeah.
Speaker 5:Yeah, I just forgot to look it up and I'm kicking myself me circle, no, so it's like um, I Think it's if you combine like, there's like an, something that looks like an H in a T in like oh, the Old runes or whatever, something like that.
Speaker 3:It's yeah runic scripts, so I like that, it's, it's one of those. Yeah, chemical symbols.
Speaker 5:Yeah, it's an alchemical. So yeah, thank you. Thank you, it's one of those, yeah like brimstone perchance. Yeah, it's literally. It's one of those. Yeah, yeah, I just don't remember which one it is. I think it is Brimstone, because it was in Castlevania. It was in the Castlevania show.
Speaker 4:No, this is brimstone. It probably wasn't that one. I think I want to know this. Oh, oh, no, yeah, we'll figure.
Speaker 3:No, the one that's in.
Speaker 5:There was in Castlevania the show, I think not brimstone. What is happening? I don't think I don't forget.
Speaker 1:Anyway, don't matter, right now Nothing.
Speaker 5:Don't worry about it.
Speaker 3:Anyway so Castlevania podcast. Oh yeah, it doesn't take much man.
Speaker 5:She freaks out a little bit about Alan's growth and she's saying things like oh, we'll figure this out when he grows, dad, trust me with this. And. And then we're done with the video. But we still have the closed captions. And again, oh boy, is a fucking novel in the closed captions here. So we get dad, dad, something to the kitchen. Dad, dad something dad, something in the kitchen, dad oh.
Speaker 5:Yeah, you found my you found my creature, your creature. What do you mean, daisy? I've been hard at work in my lab creating this. Oh, dad, it's moving. That's because it's alive, daisy. I'm scared. I've been working night and day at the lab. Look at this, daisy. I made this.
Speaker 4:Without context. This is, this is.
Speaker 5:It's making noises. Yeah, daisy for God's sake, look at this, come here. Oh, look, see it moving. This thing is really alive, daisy, I did this, I made, I made this.
Speaker 3:Julian fucking Smith. Oh my god you don't make a pot to Kool-Aid. Well, I did I.
Speaker 4:Can see, like as Mike is reading this, I can see the, the wheels and Matt's head going.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 5:Damn it, daisy. I've done the impossible and I've created a life where there was once nothing. I can't believe you're crying about one of my greatest accomplishments. I'm sorry dad. It's just it it looks. So let's talk for a second about facts. You do know what a fact is, don't you? Yes?
Speaker 1:What is a fact? It's something that's true.
Speaker 3:My guy's a fucking manipulator, dog Do you even my notes for my videos, at last thing. I put is what a fucking rude asshole.
Speaker 5:Yeah, that's right. Well, daisy, here are some facts. I made this creature. It's my. I take your milkshake, it's my, your milkshake. I made this creature. It exists now. It's now going to live in this house. You are going to have to help me take care of this creature. Yes, dad, these are simply the facts of the situation. There's no changing the now. Yes, dad, good girl.
Speaker 3:Now there's people living in this house now.
Speaker 5:Yeah, oh, like there's people in it.
Speaker 3:Yeah crazy.
Speaker 5:Okay good girl. Now, what are you going to have for breakfast? I don't know, toast, maybe. All right, see, our lives are just gonna keep going as on, on as before. The creature won't change a thing. All right, I'm sure you're right, I am, don't worry, I'm gonna dick. It's just gaslighting the shit out of his daughter.
Speaker 3:You're probably right. Oh, I am oh.
Speaker 5:While you're eating. Put some thought into what we should name this. You haven't named it yet. No, not yet. Do you have any ideas? I don't really know what's a boys name that you like. Oh, is it a boy? It's blue like a boy, isn't it? Oh, I guess you're right.
Speaker 4:He assumed it's gender.
Speaker 5:Squeak.
Speaker 4:Fucked up.
Speaker 5:Jimmy. Hmm, I don't love that. One Makes him sound too young. He's gonna grow up to be adult size.
Speaker 1:Horatio.
Speaker 5:Horatio, like Alger Junior, maybe what child does he fucking have?
Speaker 1:Watch too much fucking. What is this? Like Alger Junior maybe? Yeah.
Speaker 5:It is Horatio Kane. Oh yeah, that might be a good one. Yeah, I mean, you made him. What do you think would be a good name.
Speaker 3:I'm kind of stumped, horatio.
Speaker 5:It could be Jesus, something biblical. Let's just throw a bunch of names out there, we'll see which one we like. Uh, okay, uh, paul, frederick, jack, nicholas, ed, uh, mason, david, jeremiah, bernard, alexander.
Speaker 2:Is this necessary?
Speaker 5:Maybe not so long. I think a simple, shorter name yes, would be good. Uh, okay, uh, norman, yes, norman, or Chad, or Nick or Fred, yeah, we know boys' names too.
Speaker 4:Good for you. Oh wait, this is a ah yes, norman.
Speaker 5:Or Chad or Nick or Fred or uh Connor or. Ben or Allen. Hey, I kind of like that one hey we got Allen. Which one? Uh, the last one you said Maybe Allen Allen, that could be good. You want to be named.
Speaker 1:Allen buddy. That was a spot on Allen impression.
Speaker 3:So we get another Allen update. Holy fuck that dad voice really hurts the throat.
Speaker 5:Yeah, you want to be named Allen. Aaaaaaahhh.
Speaker 1:I think he's gonna like it here, so next video is called Allen update.
Speaker 5:Uh, his ass be bleeding, dog. Uh, not his ass, but like him, and straight up he be bleeding, he be bleeding. She had to stitch up his neck because she says that there's an accident and his neck tore open. He's rendering it, uh.
Speaker 5:So yeah, she's got green blood, but he's all good, though Allen's all good, very blue, um, she stitched him up. He's also growing a lot still, so it's fine, but the closed caption for this is the the. The closed caption for this one is Dear lord, I must have screamed myself horse. My head is throbbing, my neck burns, everything hurts, but that doesn't matter. I'm growing, look out.
Speaker 1:Look out world. My name is Allen and I'm coming for you.
Speaker 5:Um, this next one is called and this isn't my final one it's called Allen's drawing and it's Allen Allen drawing a picture. It's just scribbles.
Speaker 1:Look out world.
Speaker 5:I'm young. I'm dumb, I'm full of cull. Say three more things about me.
Speaker 4:I'm not even laughing about that. I'm gay. I'm new in town.
Speaker 1:I have AIDS. I'm new in town.
Speaker 5:I have AIDS. I'm new in town, uh, anyways, anyway, uh. So the next one is Allen drawing and he draws a picture straight up. He just has a sharpie in his mouth and he's just scribbling on a piece of paper. Here we go, the last bit of the closed captions Las meninas.
Speaker 5:What are my personal favorites? The lighting and shading tells the viewers so much about the story. See, this young girl is illuminated like an angel. Meanwhile, the face of the mirror, hmm, he has no idea what I'm going on about. He's so cute. Not only he cares about Spanish art history.
Speaker 5:What's your favorite part of the painting, curtis? Yes, I love the. The lighting is so powerful. What does the lighting mean? Again, don't tease me, I just forgot about that. Don't tease me, I just forgot about the symbolism. I know I've explained this to him once before. Las meninas means lady in waiting. It's a really long story, a lot of history. A composition of the piece, to me at least, divides the piece into three parts Past, present and future. I don't know why I love this piece so much. Just like thinking about how much we got. Just thinking about how we got to where we are today. That's why paintings are so beautiful. There's snapshots of history. What will they think about people of our time in a hundred years? What will they think about us in ten years? Let's not worry about the future right now. Let's get dinner. I'm thinking cappas Louisiana fast.
Speaker 5:Love that chicken from Popeyes Boy. Howdy is that it? I'm assuming this sounds like it is the first introduction of how her parents met.
Speaker 3:More or less?
Speaker 5:They went to Chili's, had a good time. They got the El Presidente Margaritas. Ted Margaritas is deep in Chili's.
Speaker 4:Can we assume that Curtis is Daisy's father? Papa, yes, Curtis is. Daisy's papa. Just to put that into the either of our viewers. That will make a lot of things going forward and make a lot of sense to people.
Speaker 3:At least for me, at least for the rest of it, great.
Speaker 5:Love that we went over a lot of information.
Speaker 3:We still have half the story to go. We do.
Speaker 5:Get ready for this three hour episode. Doug, go ahead. Just kidding, say what you want to say. What we're going to do is make this a tea partner which you can probably tell by the title of this episode.
Speaker 3:If you clicked on the episode, you knew what you were getting into.
Speaker 4:You saw, that it said part one and you went two in a row.
Speaker 5:They're doing it again, two in a row.
Speaker 1:At this point we're using up all the little things, the things that are left are hey, we should have done this a long time ago. Longer we really should have.
Speaker 4:Hey we're still finding our voice. We're still in our infancy.
Speaker 3:There's one topic we've been trying to do for fucking ever. I would like to say we are going to do it.
Speaker 4:If you hear Siketa, we're done. That's it. That's our very final episode.
Speaker 2:Marble Hornets. I think that's fine.
Speaker 4:Yeah, okay, I think you're right.
Speaker 3:Nope, I'm fucking talking about John fucking Titer.
Speaker 4:No, fuck John.
Speaker 3:Titer yeah.
Speaker 4:I know None of you want to do that. I will advocate for not doing that.
Speaker 3:It's a long story, I will admit that, but holy shit, is it good you write everybody's outlines. In every word we say I will write a script for everybody and if you deviate, I get to come up with a punishment.
Speaker 4:I love that, all right.
Speaker 5:What better way to end this than, say, go to diluitycom or diluitypodcom. You can go to our Patreon at patreoncom slash diluitypod.
Speaker 4:Before we do this, can we just like, can we have?
Speaker 1:like a small session about what just happened.
Speaker 4:Yeah, we should probably do that Because.
Speaker 1:I feel like we just went from. Hey, we just talked a whole bunch.
Speaker 4:You can have seen this night everybody, I really just want to talk about some of the things that we've just talked about.
Speaker 3:What are we drinking?
Speaker 4:What are we thinking?
Speaker 3:about it's empty.
Speaker 2:Did we?
Speaker 1:I knew the song what you're drinking, in fact, hasn't been addressed no one.
Speaker 4:Well, yeah, we did say the wild turkey, because we called it almond juice.
Speaker 3:I'm drinking Alien Avatar. It's a fun beer based on pixel art.
Speaker 4:I'm drinking a strawberry cobbler sour.
Speaker 3:You could just say you're drinking a strawberry cobbler and you'd be right.
Speaker 4:I'm just drinking a strawberry cobbler and I'm right.
Speaker 3:It's so fucking good.
Speaker 5:So what are we yet right now?
Speaker 3:We're talking about what we're drinking Wild turkey, the wild turkey. Okay, cool. Now we're going to be talking about what we thought of this first set of episodes that we just heard about.
Speaker 5:I'm intrigued and disgusted.
Speaker 3:I'm scouroused, scouroused.
Speaker 5:Scouroused, scarily aroused, scouroused. Mark Meadon is scared.
Speaker 2:That's usually my default state, just scared about life and fucking my way through it.
Speaker 1:Right Scouroused Fuck your way through the horror that's the movie. Season 2 slogan.
Speaker 3:Fuck your way through the horror.
Speaker 4:I guess, I don't know. There's a lot of things that were said in this episode that might seem out of context, or maybe it's a no harm really have a lot of meaning right now, correct? Yeah? But, I'm telling you it's not our next episode will, yeah, fully alleviate, although, like what's and the wise yep, from here on out it's, it's both rattle to the end more or less.
Speaker 3:We're gonna start seeing a lot more interactions, a lot more problems. We're gonna see why we're talking about what we're talking about. This episode is more like a this is background information. We're gonna give you like the story so far kind of thing, and all the setup that you need to actually understand what the fuck is happening in this series.
Speaker 4:Yeah, and without being like Spoilery at all, we will get resolution for what's happening here?
Speaker 1:like this has a, this is not a natural, which is very unusual for the thing and so we addressed earlier that I haven't watched the second half of this, the stuff we're doing next week.
Speaker 2:I will before the next week, but I knew we were doing a two-parter, but anyway when I went to the YouTube channel. I accidentally clicked on the newest video and I was like what the fuck happened between?
Speaker 3:It's so much did occur so fucking much. Yeah, the the final video you find in this, like the newest upload, you find if you were to just go watch that you would be left very, very fucking confused and a little disturbed.
Speaker 4:Yeah, it opens with such a jarring image. That you see, and I'm not even gonna tell you what it is, but like you really, the first two seconds of the very last video are Very much just like what the fuck happened.
Speaker 3:You're gonna have to come back next week to figure out what the fuck that is or just go watch this whole party. You should do the way, come back to us next week and we'll tell you our thoughts on it. You should do both you should, you should you should be following along at home with us If you want the best experience possible, but I know where you are.
Speaker 2:Jason knows where you are.
Speaker 3:No, that's not what you want, so that's the main takeaway.
Speaker 5:He's waiting for you in the pipes.
Speaker 3:Mountain of mad pipes, pipes, fucking pipes anyway, you know where else there's pipes to lootycom yes, pipes there does it pipe dreams.
Speaker 5:You go to patreoncom, slash, to looty pod. All these are places that you could give us money and in exchange you get goods and or services, such as bonus episodes, merchandise discounts, if you're on the website.
Speaker 3:If you join the $10 tier, you can listen to us live and you can find out all the reasons that we Mainly would be canceled if we recorded every word we said Hmm, yeah, shit to you, oh, oh you.
Speaker 5:You can go to our. Buy me a coffee comm slash to looty pod. Keep in mind once again that all the money we bring in from all of these areas for the whole month of March is being donated to the.
Speaker 3:American.
Speaker 5:Cancer Society.
Speaker 3:Yes.
Speaker 5:So chucking money there, cuz it's all going towards charity and none of it's going to us. So even if you dislike, us. We just got our first fucking payment for ACS nice, even if you hate us and you don't like our content. If you this is the first episode you heard and you're like these, I suck, donate anyway, because we're not getting the money.
Speaker 3:It's all going to charity. Everything that we make, everything that we Make this this month, is all going to a good cause. So please. If you enjoy us, if you enjoy what we're talking about and you want to help us, help other people, please, for the love of God, go to patreon, sign up, for this month only everything that we make is going Directly to a good cause, so, mm-hmm, help us, help people that need.
Speaker 5:Um. I would also like to go ahead and say that you can also reach us on all of our socials. We're at the looty pod everywhere or don't look into the internet, we're pretty easy to find. You can also go to our YouTube channel. You just look up, don't look under the internet, or you to comm slash at the looty pod If you want to reach us again. Socials right there. You can also reach out to our gmail's, to looty pod at gmailcom for all inquiries, including sponsorships, liquid death, and you can also Do a little thing like go to our Google phone number 630 909 9366. Leave us a voicemail, we'll play it on the end of the show, of the end of the episode.
Speaker 3:Leave us a text, we'll respond, that's wild in it Once again 630 90 and it in it brov 6 6.
Speaker 2:Come hang out with us on the 23rd and you stumble Whoo.
Speaker 4:Yes, if you if you yes, you, donate, I will say if you come to our live, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah if you donate money during that time, it doesn't matter where you can donate to the buy me a coffee. You can donate as a super chat on our YouTube live. You can, wherever you can donate, go to the deludicom website and donate. It doesn't fucking matter If you donate. We will be punished for you donating Yep, and we will not be releasing the list of punishments until the day of the day of I will.
Speaker 4:Is a thousand dollar donation punish.
Speaker 3:I don't want to do that.
Speaker 4:I don't think anyone wants to know. I forgot what it was. Actually perfect, let's not. You're gonna have to remind me no, but I will say what. You can. Donate five dollars and bad things will happen. Yeah, it'll be a good time, but as we go, as you go up in the donation tier, even worse things will happen. I will say there is a tier, and I'm not gonna name what it is, but there is a tier that you can get Mike to get Just bitch slapped.
Speaker 3:Oh yeah, just so smacked right in the face It'd be excited for that.
Speaker 4:Yeah, because we will be bitch slapping Mike for your donations.
Speaker 3:You gotta stay awake somehow. Yeah, yeah, and I guess I guess.
Speaker 4:Mike is the best way to do that. Again. A day or two before will will release a very rough draft of a An itinerary for the.
Speaker 3:Fashion. We won't the fuck out of this, yeah we will not be sticking to the stream.
Speaker 4:Yeah, itinerary, we are going to try, but we have to fill 24 hours worth of shit into a stream and I'm sure there's gonna be like six hours of just technical difficulties.
Speaker 3:So, like easy for sure, yeah, we should come up with a punishment for technical difficulties. No no, no, that will make us make sure of shit before I'm trying ahead of time.
Speaker 4:You are very good job to be fair.
Speaker 3:We're doing a very good job. I have one more thing. I have one more thing for more than welcome to come and bitch. Slap us the whole time we're there. So that'll be the two thousand dollar. Mike's mom shows up and just beats the shit out of us, just fucking stops us out.
Speaker 4:I have one more thing.
Speaker 5:You have to write. You have to write in what? How allosaurus summer.
Speaker 3:Oh, oh, my god right, thank you so fucking much. Yeah, we have a. We have to do some wet hot allosaurus dinosaur stuff my legs are wet. I'm allosaurus I'm summer, my legs are wet.
Speaker 1:God.
Speaker 3:We're still on the first page, we drop.
Speaker 2:We drop all the time.
Speaker 3:What's okay, what's all the time we drop ball.
Speaker 4:Like two to three sentences it's been 30 years.
Speaker 5:Do it already.
Speaker 4:So, as the four of us put our belongings down, that's when a volleyball came into my lap. I was immediately surprised by the the volume Seaman covering the volleyball.
Speaker 3:We were real drunk last night, yeah you.
Speaker 4:I proclaim I feel like I should have started maybe a little further back.
Speaker 2:No, that's this is perfect the last thing I remember doing was Something about a dude looping a car. I haven't heard any of this volleyball shit yet. Oh, oh. That's right.
Speaker 5:I don't think you were here for the last time we add, we add like a whole paragraph.
Speaker 3:All right, hey, let me, let me just let me just read, catch that up.
Speaker 4:All right, try just read the whole thing. Yeah, yeah go for it fading exterior. Yeah, a penis that is too hot. Attached to this penis is a man named Roy. Roy just got off the night shift at Jiffy Lou. Roy sure knows how to lube a car, but he knows how to lube me too. That being said, I haven't met Roy yet. I knew it was coming, but that's my favorite. Yet Before I regale you with our sex life, let's talk about how it was a hot summer day it was a wet
Speaker 1:hot summer day.
Speaker 4:And I've just arrived at the beach, me and my friends Jessica, carly and Josh forgot we even made.
Speaker 3:We did give them that.
Speaker 4:Yeah, that's that's crucial to whatever we write next yes. Carly and Josh started to unload our trunk of beach gear. We began to mosey down the beach looking for the perfect spot when we noted a group of shirtless Allosaurus's beach volleyball. As the four of us put our belongings down, that's when a volleyball came into my lap. I was immediately surprised by the volume of semen covering the volleyball. Ey proclaimed.
Speaker 1:Who's got the next sentence?
Speaker 3:Matt does, I think.
Speaker 4:I think we all need to make it where all the Allosaurus is.
Speaker 5:They're just, they speak, just going. Yeah, I agree.
Speaker 3:For sure.
Speaker 4:I think we all need to make a sentence, and then that will end our this paragraph.
Speaker 5:Okay, this page actually well, yeah, matt, take us away.
Speaker 4:You, I grew, I proclaimed, was literally the life.
Speaker 2:This isn't enough semen.
Speaker 3:Is your pen run out of ink? Yeah, I.
Speaker 1:Was taken back by the that's not near enough.
Speaker 5:This is rookie numbers kid. Pump it up more. Pump it out. I.
Speaker 3:Went got a volleyball of my own for reference from the trunk of my car.
Speaker 4:This isn't nearly enough semen, all right, so I wrote this isn't nearly enough semen.
Speaker 3:That's Matt sends Mike. What do you got?
Speaker 5:This isn't nearly enough. See, see, see, man. I Announced that continuation.
Speaker 3:That's the same. You turn my sentence into a sentence for you can do that, but they have to come with another one.
Speaker 5:Hey, that's our, hey, that's my ball. Said one of the allosaurus is said Roy, said Roy, ah, we don't know, it's niggas.
Speaker 2:We don't know that. We don't know that Roy is one of the hours. Do we do?
Speaker 5:we don't we.
Speaker 3:Yeah, we do know that this person who is having a wet hot allosaurus summer fucks something named Roy.
Speaker 5:Well, you have to, you have to build with that, you have to build.
Speaker 3:Oh, we've already said it.
Speaker 5:Like what do you want me to put down hey, that's my ball, said one of the shirtless allosaurus is stomping over to me.
Speaker 4:Please hey, that's my ball.
Speaker 5:Said, one of the allosaurus is stomping over to me. I.
Speaker 4:Hate that I have some cover source a lot Yep.
Speaker 3:It's, it's allosaurus. That's later.
Speaker 1:Allo.
Speaker 3:Allosaurus. Hello sir, I know sir.
Speaker 5:What we got you today what we got here.
Speaker 1:Whoa, whoa.
Speaker 4:Okay, I said so, that's my ball. Hey, that's my ball, said one of the allosaurus is stopping towards me. Yes, the end sentence period period.
Speaker 3:My initial reaction was to get defensive.
Speaker 4:However, as I turned, the sweat gleaming off this dinosaur's abs left me Starscream say that again, but I had to make sure the whole I had to make sure the whole thought actually ended and came back around before I understand. I understand Shit. What did I say?
Speaker 3:It was such a good thought. Um, okay, it was the last thing that was said. I don't know You're romping over to me stomping over to me. Great, let's do this is going.
Speaker 4:No I.
Speaker 3:It's gonna be at least 12 Stomping over to me.
Speaker 1:My whole thing, I know.
Speaker 3:I know, no, no, mind helping me. Helping me out came a gruff voice comma. However, I was not willing to help until I saw the beads of sweat Dripping down this dinosaurs come gutters.
Speaker 4:Wow Okay, mind helping me out. I.
Speaker 3:Came, a gruff voice came a gruff voice Semi colon actually.
Speaker 4:However.
Speaker 5:I'm semi colon right now.
Speaker 3:I was not willing to help Until I saw the glistening beads of sweat dripping down. I Just gonna leave it right there.
Speaker 5:Wow, this went very well.
Speaker 4:Dipping down his come gutters.
Speaker 3:Yeah, you're up, doug that's great.
Speaker 4:We finish the page.
Speaker 3:Page one done sir, he sends it to be like I came game.
Speaker 5:What you got for us, doug, he's not going to tell us At that moment. Dugert.
Speaker 4:Doobie. So what you?
Speaker 5:called him Dugert it was at that moment.
Speaker 4:I knew in the next ten minutes I was going to make love to that Allosaurus. I was going to gobble that dick straight down my throat.
Speaker 3:That part we can leave.
Speaker 5:That'll make it past the censors.
Speaker 3:I'm just happy that when I hear that later. I'll hear every word that Doug says.
Speaker 4:I like that that was some good additions.
Speaker 5:Well, I would like to tell everybody. I hope you have a blessed rest of your night.
Speaker 4:Jason, I'm so done with this. Enjoy your morning, your night, whatever time of day you are listening this to.
Speaker 3:What say people?
Speaker 4:What say?
Speaker 3:you People say lots of things, but I as a people say please, for the love of God, stay paranoid, fight for me and I will consider your oaths fulfilled. Oh no.
Speaker 5:What say you?
Speaker 3:No what say you. No Fight for me, Um, I don't know. Don't make a weird creepy monster and then take care of it like you have to. Just don't do it. That just sounds like a bad time. I will say it sounds interesting, though. So if you're bored, maybe that's the route you go, but that's all I got.
Speaker 1:Doug.
Speaker 4:Well, what the?
Speaker 3:weird end Three. That does not sound like Doug.
Speaker 4:Yeah, I don't know. Just slap your peens and beans. Don't make a makeshift bean to slap with your peens. Oh yeah, that won't go well. It should be a organic.
Speaker 2:The way God intended.
Speaker 4:Organic bean and peen slap.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 4:We don't take kindly to that artificial bean.
Speaker 2:Artificial bean making. It is specified in one of the videos that Alan does not have genitals.
Speaker 4:Anyways, that's it, it is. Oh, that is true.
Speaker 5:It's in mine. I forgot about that. He have no PP. Yeah, metholomule.
Speaker 2:If you're gonna make an Alan at some point, include the genitals. Oh, yeah, yeah yeah. I just want to see what happens, that's all.
Speaker 4:I prefer if you're going to have an. Alan, you should have at least some sort of tutorial for me to follow, yeah, and make it like give it some nice, calming everyday color.
Speaker 3:you see, you know what I mean. Put something there that I can record.
Speaker 5:This house has people in it. Alan's tutorial Bear Imaginary bear, there you go. Bye everybody, we love you a lot.
Speaker 3:I hate all of you. We love you and if you want more information about some of the shit we talked about, go back and listen to our. This House has People In it. Episodes, Figure it out. Fuckers. Fuck off. Bye.