Don't Look Under the Internet
Don't Look Under the Internet
DLUTI 151 - Parousia Public Library
Ever wondered what creeps around the dusty aisles of the Parousia Public Library? Squib Bitbly here, with my cohorts Jason and Dougledore, as we peel back the layers of this digital haunt in our latest foray into horror comedy. You're in for a treat—scratch that—a trick? No, definitely a treat... We tackle the obscure Parousia Public Library series and why it's hidden among analog horror. With its low viewership, it's just begging for you to press play.
Join us as we wind through the "Safety Town" saga, dissecting what could easily be mistaken for a fever dream turned public access nightmare. Over doofies. Overdoofies. Ohverdufies? Overdeufies? Overdoofies.
From murderers to money launderers, thieves to thugs – police officers from the...
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Don't Look Under The Internet
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Don't look under the internet. I too am recording all of those things. Let's do our best to line this up ready on three. When I say go, just give it a, give it a clap, okay. When you hear me say go, okay, one, two, three, go.
Speaker 1:Oh god, there's such a delay I did that on purpose, just so you know that is.
Speaker 3:I hate you. Well, on that note, hello everyone. Welcome to don't look under the internet. Hello an internet horror comedy, drama, suspense, thriller of a podcast. I'm your host, squib, bitbly and with me as always. Yeah, are my two co-hosts jason hello and dougledore hello. Yeah, that's the one um weird right that we're recording on a th, but you don't know that, listener, because to you it happened on the same day as always. What are you talking about? Nothing happened.
Speaker 2:There's no there's no secrets here on the movie. We're always bare to the world.
Speaker 3:Can we do an episode where we just gaslight the listeners at one point for the entire time?
Speaker 2:I don't know what that is so fucking hilarious that you say that.
Speaker 3:I really need that to happen. I know, I have a smidge of Deluty housekeeping Up above your head.
Speaker 1:We've got Mario doing housekeeping. What You're like, it's a me, it's a me, luigi, it's a me, it's a me, luigi, it's a me.
Speaker 3:House of keeping so I really only have one person to shout out, but I'm going to shout them out. We're going to play the old-fashioned diluty game of name or bad name or bad, and here's how it goes. This is the name so over on our patreon, patreoncom. Slash ludipod. We have Baka for Brains.
Speaker 2:Baka for Brains. So shit for brains.
Speaker 1:I can't help but smile at that.
Speaker 3:Yeah, Baka for Brains.
Speaker 1:I mean, they know it, we know it Baka baka, baka. I guess it's good. I'm okay with that one.
Speaker 2:I think Everything is right with the world.
Speaker 3:I think that's up there with like what was the other one? It was like Brandon Fingle or whatever. Oh yeah, what oh?
Speaker 1:yeah, from last week.
Speaker 2:What the fuck was there? Yeah, it was Brandon Fingle, or whatever.
Speaker 3:What's up, fingle? Oh yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that one broke me a little bit.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah. That is going to conclude housekeeping. It was very short housekeeping, but if you, wow fuckers, if you want to give us some sort of currency for episodes then you can go to deludipodcom or patreoncom. Slash deludipod and become a member, and when you do that, you you get stuff. What do you say? Sheesh?
Speaker 2:Just fucking do it, Mike. I don't need the money. I would buy any product you fucking push or hawk to any money, I would probably buy Come on.
Speaker 3:It's just the air of desperation that does it for me this is why mike is no longer in sales yep, I just gave up all, all hope of selling um no, doesn't he work at the library now?
Speaker 2:damn it what'd you have?
Speaker 1:mike, I'm sorry, I gave up all hope on this topic.
Speaker 2:This is your thing.
Speaker 3:No, yeah, I started working at the library lately the only problem is.
Speaker 1:I don't know how to pronounce the library I work at. I believe the name you're looking for is Perusia Poronga. Nope, oh, pariah, pariah, poop-poop.
Speaker 3:Poop-poop, poop-poop-pee-pee the poop-a-noo-noo people library.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 3:How do you say it again?
Speaker 1:I'm guessing it's parousia.
Speaker 3:We're talking about parousia public library today, parousia.
Speaker 1:Parousia.
Speaker 2:Parousia.
Speaker 1:Don't come at us if we're saying it wrong.
Speaker 3:And we're saying it wrong, and I mean shit. You guys, y'all probably don't fucking know what this is, so I don't care. Yeah, so we the internet doesn't? We went back to our I wouldn't say roots, but we went back to youtube and uh we found something. We went back to youtube. We found something that is pretty damn niche. Almost no one has seen this. Like every video has like maybe 800 views and they only have I think it's like 3000 subscribers or something. It's a very, very small channel.
Speaker 2:I think it's 300.
Speaker 3:Yeah, it's a very small channel, I think it's 366. Hot damn, that's not much, no, and so here's what we're going to do. We're going to talk about this interesting thing, so it looks like it's a library of videos.
Speaker 2:Assortments of videos. A library of nine videos.
Speaker 3:Where do these nine videos start, except the beginning?
Speaker 1:Always at the beginning.
Speaker 3:Always at the beginning, always at the beginning. So who wants to get us kind of stalled?
Speaker 1:I'll start us off here, I want to say this is another one of those ones that we're going to talk about where I guess it's the best if you were to, I guess, watch along with us. I enjoy that aspect.
Speaker 2:And honestly I don't know if we can say that with complete honesty. I don't know if that's the best way to go about it or not. I don't know a good way to go about this follow along at home.
Speaker 3:Yeah, get yourself a bag of pizza combos, because it's the best snack ever invented. That's debatable sit down, hunker down, go to youtube, look up parabolic public library, whatever it's called hyperbolic time chamber library have a good time um.
Speaker 2:See what happens when we're not there. Doug, he brings the snacks out.
Speaker 1:No, one's there to tame him, and no, he, just I'm a pin I like how I like how he has near the, I like how he has the camera set up like there should be someone else sitting next to him. Yeah, but instead he's just like this little blip in the corner.
Speaker 3:I was thinking of putting the skeleton here, but I forgot.
Speaker 2:Skelemon, I said everything. What did we?
Speaker 3:call him Saul Skelemon.
Speaker 2:Is that what we named?
Speaker 3:him. Yeah, you named the other one, dangly Bits. He's upstairs, dangly Bits, upstairs.
Speaker 1:I knew that was a weird name anyways. So getting us back into this topic, uh, again, uh, I guess we're gonna call this, uh, an analog horror. Uh, for the lack of better word, I guess, um, with bits you like slideshows?
Speaker 1:do you like b-roll? And we got footage of things in powerpoint. Um, this is right up your alley then. Uh, so we're gonna start with a video. Um, entitled when scouts find your home and this opens up with, like a library title card, like you rented a video from your local library and they're like hey, return, return this shit, you fuck. Uh, you got two weeks to return this uh, here's the title.
Speaker 1:And then it says, uh, it's march 29, 2009, and, um, the the author is daniel park, and it says how to identify a scout with examples and, uh, how to tell us one has might, might have entered your home, um, and how to ward them off. So we get the classic powerpoint slides, are we?
Speaker 2:thinking about the same kind of scouts.
Speaker 3:There's boy scouts all over my home. I really I really don't know I'm not really.
Speaker 1:They keep trying to sell me popcorn and I want nothing to do with it so we really did go back to our roots for this one, because I did absolutely no research on any of the other videos except my own dude.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I'm really hoping yours make mine make sense, so don't expect a deep dive of this by any means.
Speaker 1:Uh, because we're probably gonna just poop all over this at the end, but um so well, I mean, to be fair, the the, the deep dive you're talking about.
Speaker 2:I don't think it really exists around this, just simply because it's, there's. No I, I agree there's nothing to explore.
Speaker 1:I I agree with that sentiment fully and you guys will understand more as we start talking about this. Oh yeah, but yeah. So we get a PowerPoint slide and it says warning signs and it says inclement weather, sudden gusts of wind, tracks from people and animals that are big, and then it just like cuts to a video of some like snow outside, like somebody's looking out their window and they see some snow, and then it cuts back to PowerPoint and it says more warning signs and it says sounds outside of your window, loss of power, the feeling of fear or danger that isn't tied to anything specific, and then auditory hallucinations, which is arguably probably the only one that is kind of actually scary on the list.
Speaker 2:So far, we're supposed to be afraid of fear itself and things outside of the window Footsteps.
Speaker 3:Are you?
Speaker 2:afraid.
Speaker 1:Look out for footprints. The scouts are here. The scouts are here, the scouts are here.
Speaker 3:Um so, apparently scouts are a thing for libraries, though. I didn't know that. But, and look at this up there are like library scouts that like. What does that mean? I forgot exactly what they do, but that is like a thing. Um, I think they like go out and they like, they like go out and like work with the community they like throw books at you and they're like read do they like, do they advance beyond enemy lines and like try to take over, like plant seeds and information and other?
Speaker 1:why didn't we like guerrilla warfare? Why don't we hit up barb? We should.
Speaker 2:We get a library warfare scout barb would know, yeah, she'd know oh shit um.
Speaker 1:So all right, so you get that list of shit and that that could possibly mean that the scouts are near or something, um. So then it cuts to a video of just inside of a dark home and just someone walking around like straight up in a dark house and they're like looking in rooms and stuff, um. And then it cuts to another power point, uh, and it says location, it says garages, uh, rooms where electronics are stored, uh, bedrooms of deceased loved ones, um, and then it cuts back to the dark house and you can actually kind of tell that it might be a garage that they're filming now.
Speaker 3:Um, this sounds more like someone forgot to pay the com ed bill.
Speaker 1:If I'm being honest, yeah and yeah, your power's going out like just it's kind of weird because it's just like all right, so they go inside the house now and they're ups, like they go in, like up these stairs, and then you see like a light in a closet and then you see like a dark hallway and nothing happens, absolutely nothing happens. It's just a dark home, um. And then it cuts back to powerpoint and it says warding off and it just says none contact with a scout. A scout angel is not advised and no attempt to pray towards the angel, or do not attempt to pray towards the angel because it will aggravate it. And then it's just another shot inside the house of absolutely nothing. And then it ends and it says email this man at d park at hotmailcom. Did you email?
Speaker 2:I sure didn't about what I don't know, what is just just email. Hey you up send nudes.
Speaker 1:send your nudes to d park at hotmailcom tell him deludy, told you yeah everybody emailed this man and just say dilute sent you, but don't be respectful, at least don't be an asshole.
Speaker 2:Um damn it dilute respectfully sends us all right.
Speaker 1:So that's the first video, um, and we move to the next video. It's called cyclone sandra, uh 91, and I could go about um talking about this episode, but to be honest, uh, they just straight up ripped some video of a hurricane and just put that as their video. That's the whole video. You, if you want to watch just a video of rain, disaster and then the aftermath of somebody driving through a town after a hurricane hit their town, watch this video.
Speaker 2:Okay.
Speaker 1:So I will say, because we're supposed to be, I guess, dissecting this topic as a whole, right.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I mean we are supposed to be informing Go watch it.
Speaker 2:I mean I guess that is our theme. Is you figure it out?
Speaker 1:but like we gotta, we gotta talk about it a little bit exactly so what I think they're trying to portray here is that, if we remember from the first video, it says inclement weather could be a sign of a scout, and we also heard that the scouts are now angels. I don't know what that means, to be fair, but yeah, scout angels. Potentially we could Did this whole town do something. Bad Is angels attacking the entire town of wherever this is the whole town.
Speaker 1:was late on their book returns and if it did so, they sent in the angel scouts to warn them. They didn't return it within 15 days. I don't have any other thoughts on this video. There's really nothing more to say. Like the video is literally just what, exactly what I said. Like there's nothing to it. There's nothing underlying, there's no hidden meanings as far as I could tell so I don't know, I don't know, I don't know it, just that's it.
Speaker 1:That's what we got. We got hurricane. We know the town. Maybe they did something bad, maybe they didn't. Who knows um which?
Speaker 2:really, really. We're really hitting it hard with the uh, with the world building and plot oh yeah, absolutely excellent, just storytelling all around so far.
Speaker 1:So we've got our third episode, or video.
Speaker 2:Three, I'm sorry. Literally all we have so far is that scouts exist and sometimes they're called angels and a hurricane happened.
Speaker 1:You got it, buddy.
Speaker 2:Okay, alright, video three. I am waiting.
Speaker 3:Quit poo-pooing it.
Speaker 2:I'm not. I need some kind of string to pull on, so my shit makes sense. If it makes you feel better, it doesn't.
Speaker 1:Right now, this is the first video that has the most analog horror quality of my three that this video has. It hits the tropes right.
Speaker 2:It's got the check marks that it hits. Puts the anal in the log. Horror it puts the anal in the log horror that is absolutely an amazing sentence.
Speaker 1:So this one's called Perusia Mission Church School Day and it starts off with the title card, just like the other ones did, but this one says that it's from 1889 and that the author is Dominic Ford, which I forgot to mention. The second video is the author was Jared Klein, which I don't know that has anything to do with anything, but Dominic Ford does come up. The author was Jared Klein, which I don't know if that has anything to do with anything, but Dominic Ford does come up. I will say I did watch a couple extra videos that were not mine, so I do know that Dominic Ford does come up again in the series, but this video seems to be directly from the Church of Perusia.
Speaker 1:We see some text and it's basically the church asking teachers to drop kids off so that the teachers can have the day off. Like hey, are you fucking done with these little shits? Like bring them to us. And then they're like we got lots of fucking activities to do, we can handle any kind of fucking behavior that kids have. And then they even Dennisis the menace, even menace the dennis. Oh my god um that's, that's some pretty.
Speaker 2:It's, that's a strut right there yeah so we get there here at deludy. We do not condone children, just I would say it do not condone children.
Speaker 1:Unrelative to our last episode where Jason really drives that point home for us so they're trying to like, really like, fucking, like pounded India that like this is this is the place to bring your kids right. And they're like here's an educational tour and it's got you know like nice little music in the background. And they're like here's a picture of our church, uh, here's a picture of our worship area. And then it's like this weird black and white photo that looks creepy as all hell and it's like this is under construction.
Speaker 3:And then, uh, after that good, at least let you know it's.
Speaker 1:It shows a picture of a doorway to a dark room with a bed. You can clearly see that this room just has like a bed in it and it just says the priest's quarters I mean, yeah, priest's quarters.
Speaker 3:I mean, yeah, priest's gotta sleep too, you know.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:I mean you know.
Speaker 1:I don't know if that's like a slight jab, but like hey, they have a molest, they're doing a molest they're doing a big molest, ah man we're right back to the weird, anyways.
Speaker 3:Jason quick Save the kids. Insert rant here.
Speaker 2:I'll cue up my rant here. Yeah, no, it's Again. We can't. I guess we gotta say it absolutely. I actually didn't even know this existed in here, but obviously we do not support anything in the realm of Anything that we talked about last week, anything to do with exploiting or just taking advantage of anybody who's a minor. Please, for the love of God, don't fucking do it. Yeah, don't do that shit If you're gonna fuck with someone.
Speaker 1:Fuck with an adult? I think that goes without saying. But you know, if you needed to hear it again, please stop.
Speaker 2:If it went without saying, we wouldn't have to say it.
Speaker 1:All right. So after we see the priest quarters we get an arts and crafts with a scripture quotes and it's like you can pick your favorite scripture and make a piece of art with it. And then it cups like abruptly and kind of turns like black. And then it cups like abruptly and kind of turns like black and then it shows like an example of like what a kid wrote as their scripture quote and it says he lurks within the building. The children must repent. They will be the first to be taken. Do not be afraid of the pain. He is calling us home. The destroyer is already near. And then it just kind of cuts to a video. It cuts to like this video of someone like walking up some set of stairs which looks like he's going right into the same picture of where the priest's quarters were.
Speaker 3:And then I was really thinking you were gonna start rhyming, but none of that. None of that rhymed and I'm a little disappointed. You let me repent. I'm like, oh yeah, tell him to get bent. You didn't even do that hey.
Speaker 1:I'm not going to help him out. I'm not going to help him out with this one. So, yeah, we get that video where it looks like somebody's going up some stairs that lead to that priest quarters and then it's just a dark video of basically someone walking around the upstairs of a building. It's just like the other videos where it's just somebody walking around and like really nothing happening, and then he's always just like, well, I say him, but whoever's filming is just like always looking out the fucking window.
Speaker 1:Um, and I mean it all comes back to that first video of like, oh, if you hear some shit out your window, I mean it's probably not because it's a fucking window to the world or anything, but like you might see some shit out there. That means that the fucking angels are coming this, um, there's some fucking, so they're always. It's just, it's just that. And it just cuts back to another like slide for the church, and they're like, hey, we, we hope to see you soon, my guy. And then, uh, that's where the video cuts out, and that is the third video, pretty much I'm is there.
Speaker 3:Do you do you know how I can sign amelia up for this place, because it doesn't sound half bad?
Speaker 1:yeah, yeah, you just talk, you literally just toss her out the window.
Speaker 3:Oh bet, Okay, that's easy.
Speaker 1:You just throw her out there.
Speaker 3:They do, they'll know, they're hiding in the tall grass just waiting for me to leave her alone for a second Absolutely Well.
Speaker 2:With that, we're going to go ahead and move on to another video. So I know we just talked about Perusia Mission Church School Day, as well as a hurricane and some scouts whether that be Boy Scouts, girl Scouts or Scout Angels, you will never know. This one is titled Missing Persons, case 451. And this starts, just like the others, with the Perusia Public Library title screen, the PowerPoint slide, the title date published it was September 13th 99. And it goes on. It starts talking about a Perusia Police Department investigation report. It's an investigation into the disappearance of somebody named Scott Reynolds. Scott K Reynolds Apparently goes by the name Scott Kiley. It's a bad name, don't go by that. Last known appearance was 5-4 of 96 in Willow Section, perusia, new York. Let me get some other information about how police began looking in different areas. We cut to this footage of what we assume is the police walking into a field looking for this person. At the bottom we get some text that says it's walking through the field a good location to hide a body.
Speaker 3:Well, that's good. At least they found somewhere that you can hide a body.
Speaker 2:You know, there's one place We've got that first one on the list we can just build from there.
Speaker 1:Yeah, just go from there.
Speaker 2:We're making steps in the right direction. We can just build from there. We're making steps in the right direction. So after this, we get another little bit of text that says crime scene footage at the bottom and it's black, black, black and it goes to. It cuts quickly to someone that looks like they're. It's a camera angle that like jerks suddenly and we see this man. It's a video of somebody chasing a man. The video goes like super red and distorted and it's there's a bunch of sounds like agonizing whales or something like that.
Speaker 3:You shouldn't antagonize whales you should antagonize the whales if you want.
Speaker 2:Uh, I think it's may. Through july, I believe, is mating season for whales in Hawaii. Oh, cool, okay so if anybody wants to go see that Go get them there.
Speaker 2:Go get your whale dorks in Hawaii. Hell yeah, we get this video. There's a bunch of these horrendous screams. I can't tell if it's screams. The audio is so heavily distorted I can't really tell what is going on. The video. I had a hard time actually seeing it almost looks like the inside of a car, maybe, or like some seating, but you see, like the flash of maybe it looks like a face. It's really hard to tell?
Speaker 1:is it potentially the sounds of whales coming?
Speaker 2:I you know. I hope that's it, so we can put this mystery to bed.
Speaker 3:Well, it is May, so we are in the mating season.
Speaker 2:You know, you're not wrong. We are all the stars of a line for it to be whales' orgasm.
Speaker 3:Thank you, Parabellum Public Library. You did this for us.
Speaker 2:Thanks.
Speaker 1:Gunderson Nuts Can't even say the name right Parasocial Public Library.
Speaker 3:There you go.
Speaker 2:So, after this ridiculously distorted, glitched video clip, we get a cut to a very calm scene outside that's peering through some trees. We get various different shots of what looks like a yard and a house. We get this video of somebody going to the attic saying hello and we hear I can't, I don't know what it's supposed to be. It's muffled. I don't know if it's supposed to be like a gag, like a bound and gag person. I'm assuming it is considering. This video is talking about a missing persons case from the Perusia Police Department, but again, it doesn't show anything like that. There's so many window screens. Can we talk about how many fucking window screens?
Speaker 3:are in the attic At least four.
Speaker 2:It's at least four, Probably five if I had to guess.
Speaker 3:I may not know how to count big numbers, but I can at least say four, five four, that's almost five too many.
Speaker 2:So after we hit this gag person, it cuts back outside the close up of a car seat back to a steering wheel. I thought I was going to throw up watching this video. The very end of it was very uh fucking clover yeah, very, very, um, uh, shaky, shaky cam.
Speaker 3:Thank you, yes yeah, it was.
Speaker 2:It was not great but it you could definitely it. It gave off the air that this person was being chased as they're running. And it's very strange. It's very chaotic, it's hard to really tell anything and at the very end of it says if you have any info about the identity of this man, contact Perugia police. You know, I'm not going to say because I don't know if this number actually goes anywhere. People said that it didn't, but I don't trust the internet. There's a lot of trolls on the internet.
Speaker 2:I'll find out right now it's a number in New York. It's an actual area code for a number in New York, new York, but I don't think it has anything to do with anything either way. So that's the end of video 4. The missing persons 451. Um. After this we, uh we break away from the norm.
Speaker 2:We get something called safety town and apparently this is a an episode of safety town that was pulled from. It was season four, episode two, 420, was it? The description on this says Perusia Public Library is proud to present Safety Town, a public access show operating in Perusia from 1999 to 2003. After the archive tapes were donated to the library last year, the organization has taken up the duty of uploading the quirks of Perusia television to the internet. Safety Town was the passionks of Perusia television to the internet.
Speaker 2:Safety Town was the passion project of Dominic Ford, a local who owned KUMF Recording Studio. Safety Town is a combination of original footage and archival footage from Perusia's past, a sort of gateway to the past. We will be posting the remaining episodes here as well, as soon as they are released from the content inspection by the local authorities. So we find a couple of things from this little bit of information, one that Dominic Ford, that Doug was mentioning earlier was a local to Perusia, new York, that owned KUMF Recording Studio and that Safety Town. Yeah, kumf and Safety Town was one of the shows under his I don't know like jurisdiction is not the word this show sounds boring, I'm not going to tune in.
Speaker 2:It doesn't sound great.
Speaker 3:I'm not going to tune in to something called Safety Town, Now Danger Town, now that's a show. I'd watch Now Kumpf.
Speaker 2:Town, kumpf Town, 8. Kumpf Town. Now, mike, don't slight it, okay, let's, let's just see what safety town has to offer. All right, so we're gonna fade in exterior bonfire.
Speaker 2:We're gonna get a sultry saxophone playing in the background and we're gonna get something that says four valley studio presents safety town. It's an original broadcast on February 4th of 2003. And then it says do not watch if you have underlying mental. And then there's another word in a different type of font, but it's cut way the fuck off. You can't tell what it says at all. And then we fade back out and we fade into amas tree. That then fades out to airplanes and then it says produced by dominic ford. You know, really it's high production quality. We're we're starting off well so far.
Speaker 2:Um this we get some really random footage of a children's amusement park and then it says some text pops up on a black screen that says landmarks of Perusia make it wonderful. And then we get a black and white photo that's honestly kind of illegible. You can't read much on it. It says the stable I'm assuming that means that's a landmark. But then you get like two or three random pictures that make it look like something terrible happened to the stable. If it was the stable, I'm not actually sure what I was looking at when I was looking through the pictures. There's some kind of building and the very last one is like some kind of building but part of it's not there or maybe it got ruined or something. It's really hard to make out. I know I'm doing great with the information here you guys are getting a lot for Safety Town.
Speaker 3:I'm picturing, I mean, I can see it in my head. It's clear as day.
Speaker 2:Okay, well good, I'm glad you're right there. We then get a warning in red and some really creepy music that says do not go into abandoned buildings.
Speaker 3:Don't tell me what to fucking do my tax dollars pay for these buildings, so I'll go in them if I want. I'm an owner, dang it.
Speaker 2:I mean technically, if they're abandoned, they specifically don't pay for them.
Speaker 3:No, I really enjoyed the silence on that, all right.
Speaker 1:That was probably my favorite part of the episode so far yeah that was a lot. Are we still talking about Safety Town?
Speaker 2:Oh man, yes, we are still talking about Safety Town, and the last thing that we were told from Safety Town is do not go into abandoned buildings. The windows are full of his shadow. Look closer and you will see. And it zooms into this, this. So there's this building and after doug's part, I it actually did put something together for me. So I kind of now know what this is and I'll actually go into that in a, in just a few bullet points here. Um, so we go over, we see this close-up. I couldn't see shit in the building. I think it was referring to somebody or something in the window, but I couldn't see anything. Um, and then we get saint paul's school in the early days, a bunch of random other pictures, uh, a creepy farmhouse, and then we get the text your death will open the pearly gates. And then we get the picture of a cathedral and it says the cathedral the cathedral.
Speaker 3:Um yeah, is this where the priest does a big molest it.
Speaker 2:I do. You know, I think this is gonna be where the uh, the room that doug was talking about uh exists, and so we get this footage of a parking lot and we get a like a puddle and this somebody's walking through, like past some trees, and eventually we see a steeple and eventually we see a whole cathedral.
Speaker 1:You can kind of see, and then, if you look inside, you see all the people it looks abandoned. That's gonna sound great with the latency and I'm not fixing it.
Speaker 2:So we get this abandoned like cordoned off cathedral and it's whoever's filming is like pacing the outside looking for a way. In can't find one. So they come back at night and they break in and we get some video of them ascending the steps and breaking in, looking around and eventually something actually just spooks whoever's filming and they start looking around with the camera, they book it out of there and then we get footage of them walking home. Probably they're on the sidewalk now, so they're away from the cathedral. The walking gets more frantic and the hue begins to turn more and more red. Eventually they get home. They look out the window and this shadow man appears like outside with like a hat and you can't really make out what it is, but it's definitely a figure, a humanoid figure, um, and then we get the text.
Speaker 2:We hope you enjoyed this retrospective oh, boy, did I um and then it hard cuts to video game footage of a point and clip video game where you affix pictures of what looks like landscapes of nature to different easels, and there's one picture what looks like a light shining outside into a window and eventually you find a creepy clown image with a super contorted face I love that and a big blue. Yeah, that's that one's. That was exciting and you would fix that right up. And then it says in yellow text on a blue background tape end. And then it says close your eyes.
Speaker 1:And then there's 20 seconds of nothing in a black background.
Speaker 2:Close your eyes.
Speaker 3:Well, that's because you closed your eyes, silly. You're not going to see anything.
Speaker 1:I'm assuming that's what that was referencing, but I open your eyes what is that fine? Uh, it's from. It's from a game, it's called werewolves and rise ah well, I never guessed that.
Speaker 3:There you go. Damn you internet latency. Who said you can't be?
Speaker 2:funny with latency. Um, all right, so that is the. That's the entirety of safety town. To give you an idea, this whole video is like 12 and a half minutes long. That's the longest, by far the longest yeah, by far it's the longest one in the series. I also will argue that it's the one that gives away the least information. That's that tracks I don't know I guess meaningful information. So after this, the last one that I'm going over was a video called Public.
Speaker 1:Library.
Speaker 2:Television Spot. That's good stuff and it'll it's gonna you guys I know you've been worrying about this, I know you've been just just stressed. This is produced by and for citizens and there are low over, low over, wait, low over do fees. Isn't that exciting?
Speaker 1:finally, low fees there are low. Over do fees there are fees and they're low, low over.
Speaker 2:Do fees?
Speaker 1:I love the word over this is my new favorite word, actually over do fees, over do fees. I hate those over do over doofies over doofies.
Speaker 2:I hate those over doofies. Um so this is just. This is the over doofy podcast now really really over doofy podcast.
Speaker 1:So this is long over doofy. I don't know. I just can't stop saying it.
Speaker 2:Um so this is. This is produced by and for citizens, um, and we go over some community content and I'm assuming this is some content that you can find at the library. I don't know, but one of the things you can find is bird's eye view cameras, which is it looks like you can just log into like a drone that's just flying around and you can just see what the fuck's going on in town, um, you can do shop tours. That's pretty normal. You can see some different shops that are in town, um, and then there's a no text image, uh, and it's of these like tire tracks in the snow, and there's this large dark mound. It's almost like monolithic, and this cuts to somebody's backyard or it's a street after a snow, like a streetlight in the front of a house.
Speaker 2:I can't really tell. The whole video darkens and some creepiness goes on and it zooms into an area. But I'm not. I'm going to be honest. I watched this 10 second area of the video like 87 fucking thousand times and I could not see shit. I couldn't see anything, it's too dark, so I don't know.
Speaker 2:I don't know if they're trying to suggest that something's there or not, but if they are, I couldn't see it maybe that's the scare that is the end. That's the end of public library.
Speaker 3:You're not supposed to see it, jason, that's part of the scary, it's the what it's your brain. What could, what could?
Speaker 2:be, right, but there it's it. You're not supposed to show me that there is nothing there and then try to convince me that there there might be. Like that doesn't work.
Speaker 3:Yeah, show me that there's something there, but convince me that there's not, but what if there was?
Speaker 2:Yeah, gaslight the shit out of me.
Speaker 1:What if was, but there isn't what if there was, See Doug's thinking right. I'm with Doug on this one, anyway, so we're going to move it along.
Speaker 2:What if there was In this well-lit room? What if there was something I'm telling you right now?
Speaker 1:I don't know what if, if you, if I was to look at your video camera? What if there was something there, though?
Speaker 3:so the next video that we have is called scrapbooking 101, and this is introduced by the meadow injury group, which sounds like a law firm that lives on the little house in the prairie. Um, so, uh, it's. This is like your run-of-the-mill, like uh slideshow type of deal. Um, it's basically telling you how scrapbooks are fun. Who can make scrapbooks? You're probably asking Kids, can you know? Teens, they love them. The elderly don't forget the elderly, they love scrapbooking. And the disturbed Whoa, that's crazy. What? Yeah, disturbed.
Speaker 1:Oh, that's exactly what I was thinking. Is that not the right disturbed?
Speaker 3:10,000 picks in my book.
Speaker 2:I'm dropping plates on your ass, bitch.
Speaker 1:I thought Mike was going to say 10,000 fireflies and go a completely different fucking route with that.
Speaker 3:for some reason, I'm going the Owl City route with it.
Speaker 2:Would you want to see disturbed cover Owl City.
Speaker 1:I would actually listen to it. What if 10,000?
Speaker 2:But what if, though? What if?
Speaker 1:they did that I fucking hate you two. You're in your basement. I'm watching you in your basement right now, right.
Speaker 2:Don't even imagine it, just look at your basement.
Speaker 1:There was, though you know.
Speaker 3:Okay, okay. So we are then asked if you could find some family members who you might know that are interested in scrapbooking. They could be living, they could be dead. You know who cares, just see if they're interested in scrapbooking. They could be living, they could be dead. You know who cares, just see if they're interested in scrapbooking. We're not paying to make things easier, just let them find you. You know, let them find you that's all that's. This is the words that are popping up on the screen. Let them find you.
Speaker 3:Then boom make them we go from the slideshow, we're at vhs footage. Now, okay, and there's this shadowy guy who turns a corner. There it goes, so now, now, here's what you're gonna need for your scrapbook, and right, you're gonna need a binder. Okay, you need some paper. You're gonna need a belonging from a dead loved one, and this is a what they use as an example. Is this like drawing of what looks like a kid named Patrick? I think the name's hard to see, but I think it's Patrick.
Speaker 1:I think it's Patrick. It looks like Patrick from what I'm looking at.
Speaker 3:Right no. And then you also need a photo of said dead one now I'll just skip right over you guys now all you gotta do is just wait for the sun to fall. Okay, so I gotta wait for the sun to fall and we get footage of you guessed it, man. Wait for the sun to fall and we get footage of you guessed it, man, we give vhs footage of the sunset.
Speaker 1:It's just watching the sun, doing a great job at keeping the pace with the video he's watching and talking about at the same time. Um, because I well I'm not even watching, I'm just reading my and I'm listening to you talk about it and, as you're describing it, the things are coming up. So remember when I said watch this video, I totally derailed that at this point there you go yeah, at this point the opposite. Please, yeah, rewind a little bit. Go back now.
Speaker 3:Let me re-say this yeah, I'm totally going to do that. So it's footage of the sunset.
Speaker 2:Rewind the episode.
Speaker 3:Yeah, rewind the episode and me Keep going, keep talking, and you get this footage of the sunset and then it shows like a door frame and on the door frame you see like the sun coming through, like the window, and now you hear like what sounds like a child crying, crying, and I can't tell, but I'm like solid 68 positive that this is the crying of the witch from uh left for dead.
Speaker 3:Yes, I'm vaguely sure that's what it is, and uh now, if you just place all your items together but boom, someone's gonna be knocking on that door, and you just hear the knocking on the door and don't open it, though Don't you open that?
Speaker 2:door.
Speaker 3:And don't listen to them either. Don't listen to them. And then, right at the end, you hear this big old scream it's yeah. And then it cuts to a thank you sign. It's like oh, thanks for being part of the library, and that's scrapbooking for you right there, jaunty old time. Yeah, that's. Did you shit yourself, are you okay? I'm trying to because I think I have a better time.
Speaker 2:I'm sorry, I need to see your mouth moving.
Speaker 1:But I heard the noise so I was like hmm.
Speaker 3:Yeah, something was amok with Jason and amok in his pants.
Speaker 2:I mean it does kind of look like I'm sitting on the toilet right now. You might be.
Speaker 1:He could be on the shitter right now. That'd be ingenious actually, yeah.
Speaker 2:It does kind of look like I'm in a bathroom Just drop and deuce.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 3:You might be in a bathroom, is that the only place that you could get away and record in peace is the toilet?
Speaker 1:I'm trying to figure out what's to your right
Speaker 2:right now.
Speaker 1:Jason, are those shoes? Well, I meant like the color. Is that a tie? Is that what I'm seeing? A tie?
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's a tie, that's cool, that's great.
Speaker 3:Anyway, so the next episode is called to all of our audio listeners.
Speaker 2:We're doing commentary on what's behind?
Speaker 3:it's thrilling, it's thrilling 45 minutes of just guessing what's behind Jason now we're asking I did something on my mic, what the? Fuck, did I just do alright cool, you're still here don't worry, good, we can hear you.
Speaker 3:It's Now we're asking I did something to my mic. What the fuck did I just do? All right, cool, you're still here, don't worry, good, we can hear you. It's called Special Promotional Offer. Okay, it starts off and it's like Capstone Music presents, in collaborations with New Pollution, the Safety Town soundtrack. Hey, that's a callback. Would you look at that?
Speaker 3:oh, yeah, so it's the perfect soundtrack, uh, for things like dead ends, fake people, those hallucinations that are brought on by like the scouts and shit weird. Get a couple, get a couple bows tied into this, you know what I mean? Uh, some loose ends are tied into a bow here, um, and then we get this like vhs style footage again. This guy's on like a pasture, it looks like like it's like meadowlands and there's like farm animals all around and stuff, and then it starts to tell us the uh names of some of the hits from the Safety Town soundtrack. You have such bops as the Safety Town theme and you also get the jaunt I love the jaunt. And while you get these soundtrack titles again, you just kind of see these foresty shots and then you also get some wooded areas. But wait, you're probably wondering to yourself, michael, what the hell is track four called Track four?
Speaker 2:You think?
Speaker 3:of song two.
Speaker 1:By the titular blur.
Speaker 3:Track four is called song two by the titular blur. Track four is called nothing. By the titular blur, track four is called nothing, and I'm not the word nothing, it's blank actually it's like it's a bunch of underscores if we're being technical that's what you sound like uh, yes, it's a bunch of underscores, ominous.
Speaker 3:And then, uh, you're probably wondering yourself, like track five, what's that one gonna be called meadow? Oh, yeah, it's, it's nice, and you get little snippets of what, like, the soundtrack sounds like and once we get to the underscore ones, uh, it's it. It kind of dies down. It's a little bit more deep. The other ones are a little bit more upbeat and jazzy. Um, now, track six you're like whoa meadow, how can you top a meadow? Track six, it's called fake people. It's for all those haters out there, all those fake people. You know what I'm saying?
Speaker 1:it's fucking you faker news um, now fake news.
Speaker 3:Now this is happening, all with a video of the sunset and some slow down music playing in the background. We got some other titles. They don't fucking matter. One of them's like Crying Children, dot. Exe and just things like that. They're not all that pregnant. It's such a bop. The video then ends with this guy taking a video of some cows. There you go. He's just like creeping on some cows. He's like stalking them through the woods.
Speaker 2:They deserve privacy too. They do.
Speaker 3:Let them milk themselves in private their udders are not for your blood.
Speaker 2:We went the same direction, Mike. We're getting there.
Speaker 3:Return it in 15 days. All right, yes, you have to.
Speaker 1:Return it in 15 days, all right.
Speaker 3:Yes, you have to return this in 15 days, otherwise.
Speaker 2:You'll die.
Speaker 3:You'll die. It's like the ring, but for your local library.
Speaker 1:It's like the ring, but the library will kill you.
Speaker 3:You owe $10. Yeah, it's the ring, but instead of dying, they just hunt you down for a late fee.
Speaker 2:But it adds $10 to your library.
Speaker 3:Yeah, so the last episode we have here is called Vantage Commercial and it's an infomercial style video on this device called the Vantage Pro and it now has these new Navi buttons on it and this thing kind of just looks like a 90s shitty PDA kind of thing and it's got these directional buttons on the bottom and they're like dude, this thing can do everything. This thing can show you the fucking weather, bro, it can tell you if it's the humidity outside, it'll tell you how much it's rained over the year, etc and so forth. And the best part about this thing is the side buttons. Let you control, uh, various other programs. So there's like these side buttons. You have the little d-pad down at the bottom and then up at the top are a couple additional buttons that say like temp and alarm and a whole bunch of does things?
Speaker 1:Does this come with the legend of Soltar on it?
Speaker 2:I am.
Speaker 3:Soltar, I mean you can run.
Speaker 1:There's a game called Clam Digger and you just have to find parking and that's all it is.
Speaker 3:I'm just making a really really old aquatune hunger force reference I can tell oh my god, I don't even I'm done, I'm out all right, I'll finish up the episode, please do uh, so these, these side buttons let you control things like the temperature in the room that you programmed it to, so you can set the temperature of rooms. It's basically a thermostat.
Speaker 1:That's crazy but wait, there's that alarm button, that. I mentioned push it, don't touch it don't touch that alarm button.
Speaker 3:But I guess, if you feel like it, then you, I guess you should, you could, then you should. It's actually advised to for a long life, um, to push the button. So go ahead and push the button. The nice thing is, after you push the button the phone will ring, it changed and there will be no answer seven days that they will be on their way immediately.
Speaker 1:Did you say Zendaya? Yeah, that's exactly what I said. You heard me correct.
Speaker 3:So that means that they are on their way. Immediately Keep the door unlocked so they can enter, you know, to make it easier for them. So go ahead, dude, push that button. Go ahead, push it away, then it cuts. I thought you just told us not to no, no, dude, push that button. Go ahead, push it away, then it cuts. I thought you just told us not to no, no, no, push it. And now we are cutting. Okay, we're cutting, and it closes on this VHS footage of this guy going from, like, room to room in this house and the lights are off, and it ends with him opening a door, closing the door and turning the light on, closing the door and turning the light on, and then we end on a thanks for your purchase. Slide here. Now. That is the end of all the videos, all nine of them here. That is the perforated public library.
Speaker 2:That can't be correct it sure is, jason.
Speaker 3:Now you're probably.
Speaker 2:But I don't know anything. Yeah, right, but I haven't learned anything here's what you can learn.
Speaker 3:Did that help.
Speaker 2:Do you know, now that you say it like that, it made everything a lot clearer and I don't know why you didn't just say that? Yeah, I should have. I should have just led with that um, yeah, no, it ends and just wasting everybody's time yeah, it's, it's definitely ends on.
Speaker 3:I guess you could say a cliffhanger, because nothing no, nothing happens, but I don't care, that's the boys. What do we think of this one? I don't care.
Speaker 1:This is just a big fucking doofy analog horror. There's nothing coincides to each other. They have a few references.
Speaker 3:All right, let me back up here. Doug's like hang on, Let me take my Hold on. Yeah, let me take my heart medicine real quick before I get into this.
Speaker 2:I gotta take my daily bath.
Speaker 1:Hold on one second this is really All right, so I don't like it. Let's just be. I'm gonna be upfront about it. All right, I don't care about it, I don't like it Nothing made sense. I didn't get any answers. It was like three years ago, so we're not getting any answers at this point. Mike, do you want to just tell us why this is here and for what reason? Because there's a big piece of this whole thing that none of us mentioned about any of our videos.
Speaker 2:I know, to be fair, it was mentioned like two times very briefly, and I will say you know what. I'm going to mention it one more time right now. I will say the soundtrack to the. Safety Town video was a fucking banger. Like it was great, it was fucking. It was better than most of the other music in any of the other videos.
Speaker 3:It was awesome, yeah, and the soundtrack in mine was definitely a sound. So if you go, this whole thing is very incoherent and doesn't make a damn lick of sense and you're probably asking yourself when you're listening to this like, hey, dude, what does this mean? So if you take a look over at the community tabs in the YouTube channel, you'll notice a lot of advertisements for a band called New Pollution. Hey, look at that. We've mentioned that word those words a couple times.
Speaker 3:The community tabs actually link to a band camp site for New Pollution and if you listen to some of the music it sounds pretty similar to what's going on. In some of these videos you can also find it seems like they also have either a tour of sorts or an album was dropping at this time, called exercises of the suburban mind, because you also find links to, uh, wonderville, uh new york city events, and this is part of it and it actually is happening like this year, like it's. It's, I think this month is when this thing is happening, so it's kind of fun, um, but it does seem like they did a very poor version of Aranis on us, oh yeah.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah, yep.
Speaker 3:Yeah, this yeah.
Speaker 1:I don't mind when a band or someone's trying to market, like create a story. We see it with movies all the time An analog horror or something. It's fine Like you can do that.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I don't mind, yeah, but make it good, make Like you can do that. Yeah, I don't mind, yeah, but make it good, make it cohesive.
Speaker 2:I mean, the assumption is that there's like at least the tiniest bit of lore built around whatever you're linking to this story for you to play off of. So like. I think the thing you need to remember here is if you're using something like this, an analog and arg, anything like that, that is story, albeit very loosely but story driven you need to have some kind of story element to what you're promoting.
Speaker 1:And if you're trying to promote a band, you need to create something kind of like how kfc murder chicks integrated themselves into this whole storyline of like this, this keyword that may get got like well, I think it and I, I think also like they spent you know nine videos of worth of time, like they had to have taken a bunch, like I mean, I'm sure it didn't take them too too long to do all this, but like it had to have taken them some amount of time to make these nine videos. They had to do some sort of recording, like video for these videos, or this person whoever they really are did um, and I think they just like I don't know, like shit, like they had like some massive adhd and just like could not formulate a full story into like one piece, like they couldn't, like they had like 45 plots going at one time, you know, and just like couldn't sit there I didn't.
Speaker 2:I completely forgot. I forgot about the fucking scouts.
Speaker 1:Well, that's because you said they couldn't like find like, yeah, where did they go?
Speaker 3:so some of it. Some of it makes sense to me in in an essence, like for, for example, I could put up with that. There's no cohesive story, because if you go to the YouTube page it tells you like hey, this is a gathering of videos from random people that they got at the public library. So these were like videos that were donated to this library. That's like the theme, so like to me it fine. If it doesn't make sense, that's okay, because they're just random videos found at this library that were uploaded to youtube. Okay, fine. But they tried to mesh them together at some points. Like we we hear uh, uh, the uh safety town comes up in multiple videos. Fucking dominic ford does uh, new pollution does. So it would have made sense and it could have made more sense if they kept it all kind of like an anthology, like each video is its own different thing, but they try to tie everything together which, in my opinion, kind of clashed with what I think the original concept was and my?
Speaker 2:I guess the question I have is what like this is analog horror, which means the the way it's set up is that there's somebody is trying to inform somebody of something, and that's usually how analog horror is set up, because it's like, hey, somebody found something they weren't supposed to. Now let's make sure that other people know about it. I don't, I don't know what that thing is I will say in this in the lieu of just everything.
Speaker 1:Uh, obviously we all think that it's not up to par with where it should be. Um, I'm not a content creator, I'm a content reviewer. I'm sure I wouldn't be able to do anything better than this, and I I I say that loosely because we tried, I mean yeah right.
Speaker 1:So I mean I'm not like, I'm not saying it's total trash, I'm not saying that like they should give up on their dreams or anything like that, but like, um, I think it's uh, for what they were trying to do, I think they could have done better, for sure, um, it is what it is realistically like it's it's just, you know, it is what it is.
Speaker 2:That's my review of what this is like realistically I think we just I think, I think we just have notes and I think, like this, I mean some of the concepts that I ran into, like hearing the words like a scout angel, like that, that that puts so many connotations and thoughts in my head that are kind of terrifying. It makes me think of like oh, is this an analog horror about like a war between, like heaven and earth? And some weird like, and these are like some weird home invasions where the, these angels are kidnapping people, and that could be very well. What's what's what's happening? But I like I don't.
Speaker 1:I have no idea, yeah.
Speaker 2:And anytime they they started to go forward with one thing, they like stopped and they started to do another thing, and that's all fine and good if you're world building. But the notes that I'd like to give are that you did some of the, the tropes right. Like the creepy factor was there, the, and had there been a little bit more to invest in, I would have been hooked a little bit more. But because, like there, there just wasn't that, that central theme of like, why are all the? Why are all the? Why are these nine videos important? Like there's, there's a. There's got to be more than these, just nine videos in the library. Well, that's the thing too, that like there just has to.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I think that's what upset me too, is like uh, I like I started off doing the research and as soon as I had that second video where it was literally just like someone's b-roll of, just like a like actual hurricane that happened somewhere, without anything added to it, like they literally added a title card, and then they just were like I'm gonna just stuff this b-roll here and that's my video, that's my whole video, like what the fuck is that? You know what I'm saying? Like I, I, I don I don't mean to sound like a dickhead, but like do better, like there's.
Speaker 1:it's that that's so lazy.
Speaker 2:It is.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I'm not, I'm not trying to like, I'm not trying to poopoo it that much. I mean it. I it definitely. Like you said, I can never make anything and I couldn't make anything that looks a fraction of as good as this. Never make anything and I couldn't make anything that looks a fraction of as good as this. Um, but I do. I am just gonna throw it out there again like I'd be okay with the stories not making sense altogether.
Speaker 3:If you're going for that anthology theme that, like the bio of the youtube channel made it seem because it's from a library, but because they tried to put it all together, that's where they lost it. Too many ideas. If that was the case, you should have stuck to making the theme. Like a kid goes to this library and they find a weird book or a story or something in the library and they're like, oh, I'm going to go back to see if I can find more information on it, and they go back to that library and find more and then weird things started happening at the library where, like, people are watching him at the library and he's being stalked by these scouts for the library, because he's finding too much of this weird hidden information.
Speaker 1:Don't give him ideas, bro.
Speaker 3:Save that for us, bro, and you should. You should have done something like that if you wanted, but yeah, I don't know. Like you guys said, they tried to mesh the storylines together.
Speaker 2:I think the concept of this would have.
Speaker 2:Honestly, I can't believe I'm fucking saying this after all the comments we've made about this but if they had done an Ash Vlogs with this, it would have worked out better. And I don't mean make a story so convoluted that they can't finish it and then stop caring about it to go make a movie. I don't mean that. What I mean is when we like the theme that ran throughout ash vlogs was that you had this very normal set of videos, but attached to them were these very abnormal sets of videos that put questions in our brains like well, what the what the fuck's going on here? So like, let's say, they had a, like a videotape from the library and, like, all these nine videos were just normal videos that you find in the library. Now, if you'd put a link, an unlisted video link, in the description let's say, somebody recording the exact same video with, like, like from a phone on a computer screen or something, but it's like the original version and it's like super fucked up and horrifying I think that would have worked a little bit better here.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I'm not, I'm not sure. Yeah, there's a number of things I don't really know what. Go ahead. It could have, like, I guess, saved this in my eyes um, again, it's, it's watchable. It's not like something that you can't sit down and just take in for the nine videos that it is. It's not like it's the worst thing.
Speaker 2:It takes 45 minutes.
Speaker 1:It does leave a lot of questions, it leaves a lot to be desired, it leaves you kind of just wondering what's this actually about? I guess and I guess that's the thing when we talk about analog horrors that, like you know, a lot of people are doing it right now. There's a lot of, you know, few and far between good ones, I guess, for lack of better word, but that's not to say that, like you know, people didn't try to do something different, but like this, this one, just like I don, I don't know, I felt like they. I think I liked the fact that they used a lot of footage, like actual footage that they made, uh, which is which?
Speaker 1:is good yeah it wasn't just purely a slideshow, um, but like I mean, let's be real, like it, the footage they did have had nothing of substance for the most part, which kind of was upsetting because, like I thought, at least at some point I'd see a video and, like you know, like maybe something creepy would happen or there'd be something in the corner or like something that you could catch, and, yeah, it just kind of didn't happen. So, like you know, again thankful, like thank, thank god, it's a shorter series, but, um, um, I don't know, I just I thank god.
Speaker 2:Maybe it needs more, maybe it needed less I'm not really sure actually, but um, but yeah sorry, uh, if you're the creator of this.
Speaker 1:I'm so sorry about that. I don't know what to say about that one, but uh yeah, and again, like I, I see some creativity in this.
Speaker 3:So like if you're the creator and you're listening, like apologies if you, if we're bashing it or whatever. But like I, I I do see some good ideas here. I do see some good like fun, interesting things going on here. So I would say like next time, if you're gonna make one, don't like I feel like you put more time and thought into it than just making it an advert for your band do better to me it feels like there wasn't much heart in this other than band advertisements.
Speaker 3:So just just do it because you want to make an analog whore, not because you're trying to advertise for a band.
Speaker 2:I would say well, it's also an excuse to build some lore around your band and then you can like that would. If you're doing it for your band, that would give people listening to your band something else to talk about when they're talking about you like it's just it's it's symbiotic and complimentary you know what else we could talk about, but you have to put in the work what how you can go to mike's like get us out, get us out Go to Deluiecom Mike's like, get us out, get us out.
Speaker 1:Well, no, I guess Do you guys have anything else to say on it?
Speaker 3:I guess yeah.
Speaker 2:No, I liked it could use work for sure. Yeah, I'm happy we came back to analog horror Again.
Speaker 1:I will say I'm glad we covered this, like I don't want people to think that, like you know that we just won't cover analog horror anymore, but we're going to cover the good, the bad and the ugly, and that's just how it's going to be and you have to deal with it, especially Matt.
Speaker 3:Ha, especially Matt. Hope he's listening to this.
Speaker 2:Honestly, I would argue that the things that we find that we don't necessarily enjoy all that much are some of our better episodes, simply because commiseration through solidarity it's great, well, or other way around. You know what I meant.
Speaker 3:You can not be that. If you go to diluticom and you become a member there, that'd be super dope. You can also go to patreoncom slash dilutipod become a member there. You can buy me a coffeecom slash dilutypod Become a member there. You can buy me at coffeecom slash dilutypod. If you want to buy us some coffees. Well, if you're real, it's going to be booze.
Speaker 3:You can do other things as well. You can go to our socials we're at dilutypod or don't look under the internet Everywhere you look. Even if you go to the spotify or something, make sure you leave a review for us. We would appreciate that a lot. Itunes as well. Those five stars go a long way. And then you could also, uh, send us an email at uh, dillypod, at gmailcom, and you could actually text us or give us a phone call at our google phone number. Our google phone number is 630-909-9366. If you text us, we text back. If you leave us a voicemail, we put it at the end of the show, like what might happen here if we have any left. I don't really remember. But uh, again, that's 630-909-9366. You didn't even mean to you, didn't even mean to do that to me, but you still found a way to cut me off.
Speaker 2:Hey man, the universe knows what it wants, I guess.
Speaker 3:That's all I really gotta say. If you're gonna go to the library, make sure you get that book back in time. Otherwise they will hunt you down and they'll probably put a bullet through your head, because those late fees, they do not fuck around Overdue fees.
Speaker 2:No, they don't Doug.
Speaker 3:What do you say?
Speaker 1:people I gotta say I don't know yeah overdue overdue for bees
Speaker 3:oh god damn it.
Speaker 1:Uh, yeah, I don't know. Slap your beans together um.
Speaker 3:Slap your beans together um my favorite part is how I could tell doug's heart is in this episode for sure. I can tell how. I can also tell how hard doug is too.
Speaker 1:Oh, jesus, that's not what, okay anyways, uh, so, uh, yeah, again beans being slapped together, as per usual. Um, maybe just think before you make an analog horror. Just do that for me. Just think hard and long about should I be doing this right now and if the answer is no that's good, that's good, let it be.
Speaker 3:Jason, what say you?
Speaker 2:I mean, as always, stay fucking paranoid, for all the right reasons, over doofies, over doofies, man over doofies, they'll fucking get. They'll get you.
Speaker 3:I can't stop thinking about over doofies.
Speaker 2:I'm gonna go downstairs and Kelly's gonna be so confused because all I'm gonna say is over doofies and she's gonna be like what the fuck is going on, so thank you over doofies and she's going to be like what the fuck is going on Over doofies. So thank you. Over doofies, over doofies, over doofies.
Speaker 1:Just wait until over doofies. Because if you say it all together, like that, she's not going to know, and then when you slow it down, she's going to be like god damn it.
Speaker 3:Over doofies, Over doofies, Over doofies. All right, so we're going to end the episode on that one, aren't we Over doofies? Goodbye everybody. Have a nice rest of your day and just remember Jesus Christ of the Latter-day.
Speaker 1:Saints loves you. Don't let the bedbugs bite you on your dick on the way out Over doofies.
Speaker 2:Over doofies, goodbye.
Speaker 3:Over doofus, bye. Over doofus, over doofus, over doofus. I'm done recording now.
